Subject: Repost: Argon's Last Mission

Date: 22 Sep 1997 00:00:00 GMT

From: nospamum@radix.net (MegaLiz)

Organization: MotPU: Where Binary Moodswings are ALWAYS on the Menu

Newsgroups: alt.foot.fat-free

I was serving my last mission on the LOK GB-HK 85 sub off the

coast of a run down Maxi-Mart when the GEMINI picked up something

about 600 ft. and closing. It was as long as three reactors and a

hundred times as fast. I assumed it was a Soviet S.W. coastguard unit

set off by the GEMINI. It was undulating between the surface and the

water. It was sort of a Bio-mechanical water snake. It was ramming the

sides and disabled our satellite connection with its nose and knocked

a lot of the maintenance crew off the deck. We had sprung a leak in

the frontal torpedo room just before it blew up about 1/4 of the

vessel. I was putting on my shirt shortly before all this happened and

as luck would have it I had a lead pipe with me. I heard screams

coming from the crew's quarters and my friend, Zane, running as fast

as he could towards the water was engulfed in flames. I screamed at

him to stop but he kept on running. God, that would have made a good

picture. The snake-thing tipped our side of the sub over and a rolling

torpedo knocked me into the water. I saw Zane start to sink and then

the snake-thing tore him into bite sized chunks of bloody miscellany.

It made sort of a droning sound under water. It spotted me and

charged. It's nose hit me square in the stomach and brought me up to

surface in the time it took for my stomach to start hurting. It shot

me up about 20 ft. and when I hit the water it started charging again.

So I licked him upside the head with that lead pipe. I kept on hitting

him over, and over again this time in it's neck. There was a panel

marked with some hieroglyphics, that's what I was aiming for. When I

finally opened it up, there was a series of fat cords. I ripped one of

them out, a thick, hazy fog of cyan blinded me [momentarily]. Still, I

slashed and tugged at the cords. When I was finished with the cords I

started beating it in the head again and the stuff from the cords

started leaking from every orifice in it's body. I washed up next to

some Siamese immigrants who were cheering and singing something. I

went inside the Maxi Mart. I was in need of relief. After I got out of

the bathroom I looked through the books. It consisted of about every

crappy book money could buy. I looked through the fiction section and

there was nothing good until I came across a small nylon sign. I guess

it was a disclaimer written in Navajo. I looked behind it and I saw

copies of "Idoru," "Neuromancer," "Necronomicon," "AHr+," and other

good ones. I turned around and saw two tall, ripped guys in jet black

suits. One of them took out a ID card. "Sir, we are with the U.W.O.

and we have come to inform you that you are guilty of conspiracy,

fraud, and armed assault. You will await breaking on the rack at 08:00

hours."

That grapefruit was the size of a tumor,

Argon

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