From ksantos@uafphpl.uark.edu Tue Jul 07 15:52:43 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Mean Practical Jokes
From: "St. K" <ksantos@uafphpl.uark.edu>
Date: Tue, 07 Jul 1998 15:52:43 -0700
My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
Thanks in advance,
St. K
From bbombere@erols.com Tue Jul 07 14:14:10 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: "=?iso-8859-1?Q?K=F6nig=20Preu=DFe?=, GmbH" <bbombere@erols.com>
Date: Tue, 07 Jul 1998 17:14:10 -0400
St. K wrote:
> My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
> looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
> like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
> day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
> they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
> sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
>
> Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
>
> Thanks in advance,
> St. K
Getting Even 2:
George Hayduke, a veteran trickster who long ago decided that
he "was mad as hell and not going to take it anymore," wrote the roaringly
successful book Getting Even. Now Hayduke has come up with a
fascinating ingenious and humorous compilation of tricks guaranteed to
make life miserable for those miscreants who have made life
miserable for you. This book can solve problems.
From saint@!bugger-off!prairienet.org Tue Jul 07 14:44:25 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: saint andreux <saint@!bugger-off!prairienet.org>
Date: Tue, 07 Jul 1998 16:44:25 -0500
St. K wrote:
> My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
> looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
> like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
> day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
> they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
> sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
You know, right before I left for Brushwood, rather than
pack my stuff for the move (which I should have done),
I ended up watching "The Breakfast Club" again.
Remember that part where Emilo Estevez breaks down
with guilt because he taped that guy's butt shut?
I just thought it was worth bringing up again in light of the
above.
--
saint andreux --><--
"the pervert is back!"
www.prairienet.org/~saint/
From see_address@my-sig.com Tue Jul 07 15:08:20 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: see_address@my-sig.com (rrevved)
Date: Tue, 07 Jul 1998 22:08:20 GMT
On Tue, 07 Jul 1998 15:52:43 -0700, "St. K" <ksantos@uafphpl.uark.edu>
wrote:
>My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
>looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
>like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
>day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
>they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
>sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
>
>Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
>
>Thanks in advance,
Gift-wrapped box full of crickets mailed from another state/city?
Available at your nearest bait shop..
--
* rrevved at mindspring dot com
* s.p.u.t.u.m. unit.26
* http://www.sputum.com
From charliec@cybernex.net Tue Jul 07 20:00:31 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>
Date: Wed, 8 Jul 1998 03:00:31 GMT
St. K wrote:
>
> My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
> looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
> like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
> day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
> they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
> sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
>
> Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
I
Go to BB's house with about 300 feet of fishing line or black thread.
(something not likely to be seen easily.)
Tie one end to the downspout from the gutter on the
side of BB's house. Play out enough line to go a few houses
down the street, or across the street.
When all is quiet, pull the thread or line taut. Rub your fingers
along the line. This will produce a low pitched vibration that
will sound as if it is coming from inside the walls. Don't do it
long enough for BB to find the source, and if any porch lights
come on, drop the thread. It won't be seen. After BB searchs the
grounds and finds nothing, let her go back inside and get settled.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Go back tomorrow night.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Eventually, she'll keep coming in to work late from missing
all that sleep and get fired. If not, proceed to plan two.
II
Call the local newspaper, classified department. Put BB's
house up for sale, very low price, no phone calls please,
advertise an Open House. If they need phone verification,
place the ad in person, pay in cash.
III
Have BB sponsor a pizza party for the local Little League.
Get all the teams to show at her house at a particular
time for free pizza and Cokes. Time the pizza deliveries
(from several places, doesn't need confirmation) to co-incide
with their arrival.
IV
Does BB have any dogs? Best idea I've heard came from a neighbor
of the victim who had 2 poodles. The neighbor hooked up a fishtank
air pump to a dog whistle, dropped the air hose out the window and
let the pump run. When the digs kept barking after midnight she
called the cops. When the cops showed up she unplugged the air pump.
When the cops left she plugged the pump back in. When the dogs started
barking again, she called the cops again. This went on for about a week
and cost the 'victim' about $200 in tickets. Then the landlord evicted
them because the dogs were such a 'nuisance'.
Merely walking by with a dog whistle would also work, but lack the
same opportunity to wreak havoc over a long period of time.
V
Get any private info? Credit card recipt?
Three words..
Home Shopping Network
VI
Have an accomplice call BB's boss, verifying employment and
exaggerating her position. Have the caller identify themselves
as an employment agency or head hunter.
there's tons more, but these came to mind
From Bob_Chapman@SLAQ.brown.edu Wed Jul 08 10:16:53 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: Bob_Chapman@SLAQ.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)
Date: 8 Jul 1998 17:16:53 GMT
In article <35A2E0CF.4EAA@cybernex.net>, charliec@cybernex.net felt
like sharing this:
>
>St. K wrote:
>>
>> My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses.
I'm
>> looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
>> like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
>> day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
>> they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
>> sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
>>
>> Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
>
>I
>
>Go to BB's house with about 300 feet of fishing line or black thread.
>(something not likely to be seen easily.)
>
>Tie one end to the downspout from the gutter on the
>side of BB's house. Play out enough line to go a few houses
>down the street, or across the street.
>
>When all is quiet, pull the thread or line taut. Rub your fingers
>along the line. This will produce a low pitched vibration that
>will sound as if it is coming from inside the walls. Don't do it
>long enough for BB to find the source, and if any porch lights
>come on, drop the thread. It won't be seen. After BB searchs the
>grounds and finds nothing, let her go back inside and get settled.
>
>Repeat.
>
>Repeat.
>
>Go back tomorrow night.
>
>Repeat.
>
>Repeat.
>
>Eventually, she'll keep coming in to work late from missing
>all that sleep and get fired. If not, proceed to plan two.
This is very similar to, though lower-tek than, one I heard about from
a friend of mine.
1)Get BB's phone number
2)Get a cellular phone
3)Go into BB's back yard late at night, at a location where you can
easily see the nearest phone to BB's bed (get binoculars if necessary)
4)Call her number. As soon as she's out of bed and about to pick up the
phone, hang up.
5)Wait until she gets back in bed
6)Repeat steps 4 and 5 ad insanium
StCBtC
From Unit4@Sputum.Com Wed Jul 08 13:26:38 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: Unit4@Sputum.Com (Doktor DynaSoar)
Date: Wed, 08 Jul 1998 20:26:38 GMT
In alt.slack St. K wrote:
^My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
^looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
^like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
^day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
^they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
^sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
^
^Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
Capsaicin powder in the tampax.
--
(@ @)\DynaSoar\___, Doktor DynaSoar Iridium, Scienfictiontologist
ll ll Yetii Genetii Research InstiToot, Somedamnwhere, VA
Clench of The One True Pipe Dream, ElectroChurch of the SubGenius
From unit24@sputum.com Wed Jul 08 17:28:34 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: unit24@sputum.com
Date: Thu, 09 Jul 1998 00:28:34 GMT
On Wed, 08 Jul 1998 20:26:38 GMT, Unit4@Sputum.Com (Doktor DynaSoar)
wrote:
>^Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
>
>Capsaicin powder in the tampax.
Damn, you are one EVIL bastid.
Will you adopt me?
xxiv
From sluglips@frostedCheez.com Wed Jul 08 17:55:18 1998
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: Mean Practical Jokes
From: sluglips@frostedCheez.com (Yard Man )
Date: Thu, 09 Jul 1998 00:55:18 GMT
"St. K" <ksantos@uafphpl.uark.edu> wrote:
>My wife is on the verge of killing her boss in front of witnesses. I'm
>looking for ideas for merely terrorizing the bitch. You know, stuff
>like super gluing her fat ass to the chair she never moves from all
>day. We can get lots of cooperation from co-workers, but I'm afraid
>they'd roll as fast as the bad guys on NYPD Blue if Wifey actually
>sliced boss bitch's head off in front of them.
>
>Any tricks to make BB think she's losing her mind would be great.
>
>Thanks in advance,
>St. K
can't tell from your post if "the bitch" is the owner of the company.
Everwhat. Tell your wife to start her own company, go into competition
with her (or her boss), and run him/her/them out of business. That'll
show 'em. Heh heh.