Jim the Prophet

Licensed SubGenius Preacher

jimvan@gate.netFrom: jimvan@gate.net (Jim Vandewalker)

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: Slack (questions, that is) <><

Date: Wed, 09 Oct 1996 00:00:09 -0500

Organization: CyberGate, Inc.

In article <3259C5E9.148F@hotmail.com>, Meredith <meredith01@hotmail.com> wrote:

> <><><><><><>NEWBIE<><>ALERT!<><><><><><><><>

>

> What exactly is this substance called slack?

You ask of the SALCK and it are good questions, all end in "?" not like

some quaestons HIDE thier true slefs, try to LEAF OF theyre "?" NOT FULE

Godo Fropephto Diego (haw-haw, seckret idenitity form REAL NMAE JIM, shh,

dont tell), BUT YOURE qeutsons have ROUND FERM "?" therefoure desservice

GOOD ANWSERS not stuppid witticismes at uyor exspenserianse. (ALTOGHUH,

will half to be purulently binominal CHARGE (positive, in this battery

case), Informatsion Hihgweigh is TOLE RHOAD, eksxept if your ROLE TOAD,

dont hlaf to payed, give you BIG DISCOUNT for wartz.)

> More importantly, can one obtain it without money?

NO! DID'TN YOU LITSEN? Want anwsers, GOT TO PAYED, dont try to weezil out.

NO GOOD if uyo don't coume up with GREEBLEE DOLLARZ. With +charge (See

note abvoe about battrey Kase -- that JOKE in Deutshch, mean electroniqual

CHEESE)(But got to have little dots uber the "a".)

> My dad used to fish a lot (now he's too old). Is the word "slack" a

> vague reference to its useage in fishing?

You heare STORY about short skinny OREINATAL monkey, WAK other littl

monkey on HED with STICH, tell litlte mankey, "That sound of ONE HAND

HITTING!" Dum story you think, becuas you do'nt knonow real DEEP DWON

MEANING, witch is ORTHANGIOLE ZEN ADOMISM. SticK is FISHIN stick. Oh yes

yes, all true. SAME fisshon used in ATMOIC BOBM. Ha ha, BLOW UP that

lillte mnokie all to ADAMS. POW! Monkeiy fur and gutz an stuff evyerwere,

but NOT BRAIMS, that ssatorie tell all abuot SLAKC. And adamaic fishong.

> (Is the acquisition of slack somehow analagous to prolonging

> one's life?)

Bet that liddtle MNONKEY not THIMK SO. Lerned GOOD LESSONE, stay away from

monkey with SITCK, wak you on the HED, blouw you ALL UP. Game OVER, Dude,

ha ha, that teckhie tlak, Jim heare lot of Greeks talk to eiach othere on

alt.salck, learn Greek-speek.

> And who

> the hell is this "Bob"? Is he the "fisherman" who will cut you some

> slack? or perhaps the game warden? Or the aminal rights activist?)

^^^^^^

HO BOY, yuo make raelly BAD spellinge mistaek, you get FALMED GOOD by

Spennilling and Granmar Nazty, she's NOT NICE. Has ruler with SHARP EGDE,

wak you lots. Ow. Hurts. Wont blow you oup thouw, not like moneky with

atnomic fishin stikk. I open koan for you with brass koan opneener: "Bob"

is not monky gets wakkid, no-no, NOR EITHER makney who whaks, nope, not

him. "Bob" is FISH. Ha-ha, big joke, rememember, was FISHON stick!

> Am I right? Would you admit it?

> Give me some good answers and I'll grace every last one of you with my

> occasional presence on your little newsgroup. I'll read some of your

> articles. and Perhaps I'll laugh. XOXO

You lauhgh not so mutch if ARMRADLILO NUCKFRUNTS catch you potsing

cupie-pie XOXO hubs and kistles. He lots more wierd than me, not like

kinldly Godde Porfphret Jim, I watsch out for you, want to help you out,

NOT LIKE THE OTHERS, but MARADILDO TUNFRUCKS, he spongturate, SPONGTURATE,

worst of others, breathe LOT of smotke from "Bob"'s pipe, make hem wuyrd.

Also he get wakked ALOT by Spelining and Grandmar Nasty, make his hede

BENT.

Proprofpet Jim tell you SCECRET of alt.salck, BEST SubGominus to get TREU

andswers from is KINDLEY UNCLE NENSLO, alwaiys wants to hlep new person,

takes TIME to eckxsplane stuff in easzy to udernstand but porfound way. OK

to XOXO huds and kimples NICE NENSLO, he like that.

Send $1 to The SubGenius Foundation,Inc. PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214

--

Jim the Prophet

Licensed SubGenius Preacher