Top 20 Reasons Why...
|
Fencing is better than Heavy Fighting
|
|
Heavy Fighting is better than Fencing
|
|
Chainmail wedgies. I shan't elaborate.
|
20.
|
The Social Horror of getting a run in your tights.
|
|
Fridge magnets don't stick to fencers.
|
19.
|
Ostriches do not try to mate with a helmet.
|
|
Washable armour.
|
18.
|
You wash it? A quick spritz with WD-40 and you're ready to go.
|
|
Compasses work near fencers.
|
17.
|
Fighters never get lost. Just rub a cloth across the helm a few times, lay belly-down on a rock, and voila, North is revealed.
|
|
Our swords clank. theirs clatter.
|
16.
|
"ting" and "thunk" I feel are more appropriate.
|
|
Field battle. Lightning. 'Nuff said.
|
15.
|
This from a man who carries a long metal rod...
|
|
When flirting with an opponent, we can tell the gender.
|
14.
|
Hmpf. Four layers of trigger are not body flattering. But hubcap breastplates, is there any doubt?
|
|
Witty repartee doesn't sound like Darth Vader.
|
13.
|
But the repartee is soooo much scarier. "You're a member of the Trimaran Alliance, and a spy!"
|
|
Two practises per week (well, for us, anyway).
|
12.
|
Hey, I had three practices a week plus tourneys. (Couldn't walk for six months afterward, though.)
|
|
Tower shields are for those who can't use a buckler.
|
11.
|
Tower shields are for archers. Another group of point-control artists.
|
|
Fencers don't set off airport alarms.
|
10.
|
Duct taped clubs don't get you arrested.
|
|
We only take one seat in the car on the way to Pennsic.
|
09.
|
Oh please! Duffle bag, sword stand, hat box, six changes of clothes (per list), lace repair kit...
|
|
No worries about accidentally winning a tourney and ending up as royalty.
|
08.
|
Hmmm... got me there. Um, the babes like big metal hats?
|
|
Better booze (Godet vs. Beer)
|
07.
|
There's something wrong with beer?
|
|
Our weapons fit in the car, not on the roofrack.
|
06.
|
Our weapons don't fall apart if they get wet.
|
|
You can wear a rapier in court.
|
05.
|
People don't trip over armored fighters.
|
|
Smaller duct tape budget.
|
04.
|
Don't waste money on feathers, lace, and funny hats. More money to spend
on beer!
|
|
Our headgear doesn't crush the brains.
|
03.
|
Our headgear doesn't let our brains get crushed.
|
|
Tuchux don't fence.
|
02.
|
Pirates don't club.
|
|
To a rapier, chainmail is a series of linked holes.
|
01.
|
To a broadsword, 4 layers of trigger is a trip to the hospital.
|
