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Lil' Davy's Magical Mystery
Birthday Tour
October 23-27, 2000
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"Reasons Why a Supersoaker is Better Than a Man"
(Sorry, guys, the Blister made me do it?!?!?!)
- You can get wet any time you want.
- You can hold it in your hand as long as you want.
- It will never get soft.
- It's accurate up to 25 feet.
- It's good for 150 rounds (at least!)
- If it dries up you can refill it.
- It's always ready for action.
- It squirts again and again.
- You can pump it as hard as you damn well please.
- It can't talk.
- When you want to put it down, it won't complain.
- It won't squirt unless/until you want it to.
- It comes in different models: you can exchange it for a larger one.
- Water tastes better.
- It comes out in a steady stream.
- It already comes wrapped in plastic.
- It comes in designer colors.
- You don't need to stop and wrap it up before it shoots.
- It comes with instructions.
- If you get tired of it, you can throw it away (or leave it for the natives).
- It's HUGE!!!!!!