FORGIVENESS - KEY TO FREEDOM Matthew 18:21-35 "Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? 22Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. 23Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of his servants. 24And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him, which owed him ten thousand talents. 25But forasmuch as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that he had, and payment to be made. 26The servant therefore fell down, and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. 27Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed him, and forgave him the debt. 28But the same servant went out, and found one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest. 29And his fellowservant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will pay thee all. 30And he would not: but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt. 31So when his fellowservants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told unto their lord all that was done. 32Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: 33Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee? 34And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him. 35So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses. INTRODUCTION: I want us to do a little "self-diagnosis" this morning. I wonder if you have any of the following symptoms: [Taken from Dr. Charles Stanley's book on Forgiveness] 1) You "can't stand" to be around certain people. 2) You want to strike out at people when certain subjects are discussed. 3) You lose your temper over little things. 4) You struggle with guilt over things that happened in the past. 5) You find yourself hating the ones you should love the most. Who can tell me what these are symptoms of? -- Unforgiveness! I. FORGIVENESS. A. Definition: Forgiveness can be defined as: "the act of setting someone free from an obligation to you that is a result of wrong done against you". Forgiveness involves three elements: INJURY, A DEBT RESULTING FROM INJURY, AND A CANCELLATION OF THE DEBT!! B. The Attempted "Exception": You may feel there are extenuating circum- stances that gives the right to harbor unforgiveness. You say, Pastor, you don't understand My special set of circumstances. Perhaps there has been a deliberate smear campaign against you. Perhaps this year's crops have failed. Perhaps our children have rejected our values and are living idle degenerates. ["Forgiveness -- Key To Freedom" --- Cont'd] Perhaps, you have been layed off. Perhaps, my brother, you have not received that raise. Perhaps someone has said something that "really hurt". "Pastor, you don't understand My special set of circumstances" I many not know each of the "special" circumstances represented here today, but I DO know one thing --- THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS TO THE RULE -- WE MUST FORGIVE!! Reconciliation is the Christian's business, even as it is that of Christ and it knows no limits (2 Cor 5:18-20) "All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting men's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us..." (SEE AMPLIFIED VERSION) C. THE MODEL: Let's look at one Biblical model we have been given regarding forgiveness. It is found in the text we read earlier: Matthew 18:21-27. There are some significant features of this passage: 1. The man to whom much was owed: The King - the ultimate authority in that region. There was no higher to whom one could appeal. His word final. 2. The man who owed: The king's servant. One who was under the rule of the king. One that was at the sole mercy of the king. One who literally belonged to the king. 3. The debt: 10,000 talents (or literally $10 million dollars in today's economy). Scripture gives us no clue as to how this servant came to owe his king such a tremendous debt. Perhaps he made some bad business investments, or perhaps he was given to gambling. Whatever the cause, he was indebted to the king to such a degree that he could NEVER repay. 4. The day of reckoning: Can you imagine the dread that filled this servant's heart when he was called to appear before the king. Perhaps he lived with constant dread, in fear of this day of reckoning. But perhaps he was living "high on the hog" and forgetting that one day he would have to give an account of this revenue, but dearly beloved, there IS a payday, someday!! 5. The judgment: Since he was not able to pay, he would have to pay with his life, and the life of his family! 6. The cry for mercy ["Forgiveness -- Key To Freedom" --- Cont'd] 7. The response of the king: a) Realized he could NEVER repay the debt; b) Took pity (had mercy) on the servant; c) Canceled the debt and LET HIM GO! 8. Compare with salvation. This, my friend is the model of forgiveness. II. UNFORGIVENESS. A. The Model. (Matthew 18:28-35) 1. The man to whom little was owed: The servant who had just been forgiven a $10 million debt. 2. The man who owed: A fellowservant. He was not a subordinate, but rather a peer. 3. The debt: 100 pence ($20.00) 4. The action: Grabbed him by the neck and demanded payment. 5. The cry for mercy: Notice the SAME TERMINOLOGY: "Have patience with me and I will pay thee all". 6. The response of the servant: "And he would not; but went and cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt". 7. The reaction of the king: (vs. 34) "And his lord was wroth ..." 8. The moral of the story: "I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desireth me, shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee?" UNFORGIVENESS - By its very nature, it prevents individuals from following through on many of the specifics of the Christian life and practically necessitates that they walk by the FLESH rather than the SPIRIT. Listen to Galatians 5:22,23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self- control. Against such thing there is no law". Friends, the fruit of the Spirit is not operating in the unforgiving life. There is no love or joy. The peace of God is stolen. UNFORGIVENESS leads to a wrecked and ruined life. By withholding patience, kindness, etc. The person is held hostage by the flesh and is the ultimate loser. A person who harbors unforgiveness ALWAYS LOSES! Regardless of how wrong the person may have been, refusing to forgive means reaping corruption in life. ["Forgiveness -- Key To Freedom" - Cont'd] B. Bitterness: There is only one alternative to forgiveness -- unforgiveness which brings about bitterness in one's life. Then a vicious cycle sets in. Unforgiveness produces bitterness, which in turn makes us unable to forgive and be forgiven. It is a corrosive culprit that denies our peace and destroys our relationships. Hebrews 12:15 speaks of insuring that "no root of bitterness shoot forth and cause trouble and bitter torment, and the many become contaminated and defiled by it" (Amplified). Now LISTEN: BITTERNESS IS NEVER CONSTRUCTIVE -- IT IS ALWAYS DESTRUCTIVE!!! Bitterness comes from holding on to hurt, and not letting go. This holding on to hurt can be compared with grabbing a rattlesnake by the tail -- YOU ARE GOING TO BE BITTEN!!! Bitterness is like a continually running machine that uses our bodies for its energy source -- it never shuts down!! It brings about physical problems. It literally paralyzes us. Even if we want to love another person, we cannot! Because of the root of bitterness! This bitterness manifests itself in: Depression Distrust Insensitivity to the needs of others Being filled with unthankfulness This bitterness is caused by: 1) Beginning to blame someone for what's happening in you life! (Husband, Wife, Children, Employer, etc) 2) Attempt to get revenge 3) Attempt to destroy someone's name (or character) a) Scripture has much to say about talking evil of one another 4) Wrong material values a) My job cost me ..... b) My wife cost me ..... c) My children cost me ..... Notice v.35 - Jesus refers back to v 34. What does He mean "Tormentor"? Is He speaking of Hell? If so, many Christians are bound for there! (Matt 8:6 - "great pain"; Lk 16:23,24 - "agony") Here he is saying "when a Christian harbors grudges (bitter feelings) toward another - He will be turned over to the "tormentor" - tortuous thoughts, feelings of misery & agonizing unrest within. One commentator states: "This is a marvelously expressive phrase to describe what happens to us when we do not forgive another. It is an accurate description of gnawing resentment and bitterness. The awful gall of hate or envy. It is a terrible feeling. We cannot get away from it. We feel strongly this separation from another and every time we think of them we feel within the acid of resentment and hate eating away at our peace & contentment. This is the torturing that our Lord says will take place." When you have bitterness in your heart toward someone or some particular circumstance, you are allowing that person or circumstance to continue to control you! ["Forgiveness -- Key To Freedom" - Cont'd] LISTEN: I believe the Lord would have us know this : Time flees by too quickly for us to wait to forgive each other. Dad, time passes too quickly for you to wait to forgive that son or daughter. Son, time passes too quickly for you to wait to forgive that Mother or Father! Let me say a word to parents: How often we hurt our children and cause a "root of bitterness" to spring up in them. We may think, "Well, they're big girls or big boys now", but I want to let you know that we are dealing with gentle spirits! We are living with sensitive, fragile spirits! What we do today can effect our children for the rest of their lives! Perhaps we need to take time to apologize to our children and ask their forgiveness! III. THE POSSIBILITY OF FORGIVENESS Throughout Jesus' ministry, (Jesus couldn't have gone to the cross with unforgiveness. He didn't simply say "Well, ok - I'll do it"). But not only did He proclaim it, He demonstrated it with his words form the cross: "Father forgive them ......."(Lk 23:34) NOW LISTEN TO THIS: We have the capacity to forgive when we have been deeply hurt because Christ within us is able to release through us forgiveness toward anyone. Here's what we must do: 1) Must be free from sin (must be born again) 2) Must begin to realize that God is still in control (must make a choice to stop blaming and choose to understand that God is in control) 3) Focus fully on God's Forgiveness of you! (Ps 103:2-5; 10-12) 4) Must deal directly & honestly with our unforgiveness. Matt 5: 23-24 - "If therefore you are presenting your offering at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar, and go your way; first be reconciled to your brother and then come and present your offering ". CONCLUSION: Have you been hurt? Has somebody, somewhere in your past, rejected you in such a way that you still hurt when you think about it? Do you become critical of people in your past the minute their names are mentioned? Have you worked hard all your life not to become like your parents? Are there people in your past upon whom you would enjoy taking revenge? Have you made a past-time out of scheming about how you could get back at them? Were you abused as a child? Did you suffer through your parent's divorce as a child? Were your parents taken from you when you were very young? Were you forced by circumstances to pursue a different career from the one you originally wanted to pursue? Were you unable to attend the school of your choice because of financial reasons? Were you pushed out of a job opportunity by a greedy friend? Were you promised things by your employer that never came about? FORGIVE!