A Child's Garden of STUPEDS

 

For a brief time in the early '80s, the musical comedy act The Rick & Ruby Show was sort of almost famous: opening for Bill Cosby, appearing on Merv Griffin, Mike Douglas, and Midnight Special, and signed to the mighty ICM agency. The third member of the duo, keyboardist Joshua Raoul Brody, felt a need to flex his creative muscles and put together a one-time-only event, a parody of the then-nascent BAMMIES dubbed the Bay Area Dreck awards, or The BADDIES. It showcased some of the cream of San Francisco's comedy and music lunatic fringe getting an opportunity to perform material not ordinarily up their alley: Maestro Dick Bright sang the world's worst instrumental, "Music to Watch Girls By"; Little Roger Clark (of "Stairway to Gilligan's Island" fame) covered the pederast anthem "Girl, You'll Be A Woman, Soon"; and ex-Hot Lick Naomi Ruth Eisenberg did both vocal and visual justice to "Tan Shoes and Pink Shoelaces". Although the show was wildly overlooked by the public at large, the fifteen paying customers that did show up that night (including Robin Williams, Monty Python's Eric Idle, and LA's Comedy Store Players) seemed to have a good time, so Raoul, Rick and Ruby developed The Society To Undertake the Preservation of Endangered Dumb Songs as a compact touring version of the show. The STUPEDS eventually attracted the attention of the producers of Mork and Mindy, who invited them to appear on the show as guest stars in 1981 - perhaps the fact that the producer's son was sitting in on drums had something to do with it.

Since then, Raoul and The STUPEDS have gone through over five hundred songs and nearly that many musicians. They have presented Dumb Songs Festivals in clubs and concert halls all over the Bay Area, Los Angeles, and at Atlantic Records' 40th anniversary party in New York. Everywhere they go they have inspired their audiences to raise lusty choruses of boos at note-perfect renditions of the songs they love to hate: "Honey (I Miss You)", "Ballad of the Green Berets", "Ringo", every disco song ever recorded, the Diabetes Medley (every song containing the words "sugar", "candy", "lollipop" or "insulin" in the title), and the entire catalogues of Paul McCartney and that most legendary of celebrity offspring, Nancy Sinatra. In 1990 The STUPEDS made their Hollywood film debut in the monomillion-dollar sci-fi spoof Martians Go Home, prompting Joe Bob Briggs to sing their praises in three different columns and the Today Show's Gene Shalit to run a clip of their minute-and-a-half while lamenting that the rest of the movie wasn't as good. In 1990 they were selected to be the surprise guest headliners at The Residents' New Year's Eve show. The band was also mentioned in passing in Dave Barry's recent book about the worst songs ever recorded.

Since the defection to Los Angeles of two key players (and the further defection of one of them to London), the group reunites only for special occasions, like paying gigs; in the last few years these have included providing impromptu underscoring for a kids' soapbox derby, hosting a jam session for frustrated Java programmers, and being house band for San Francisco Comedy Celebration Day (inspiring then-Mayor Willie Brown to quip "You guys aren't The STUPEDS; you're the California State Legislature!", whatever that means).

Combining top-notch professional musicianship provided by some of the most well-respected singers and players in the Bay Area with a casually irreverent and hilarious attitude, The STUPEDS have acquired critical acclaim and a loyal cult following. Everywhere they play, they leave the crowd screaming "Less! Less! Less!" Who could ask for anything - well, more or less?

Last time we checked, The STUPEDS consisted of the following:

Joshua Raoul Brody (keyboards, sunglasses, dry commentary) - musical director for just about all the lunatic fringe (and many mainstream) theatrical events in the City: BATS Improv, True Fiction Magazine, Fratelli Bologna, Ian Shoales, Comedy Celebration Day, Ethel Merman Memorial Choir, etc. Also member emeritus of Those Darn Accordions! and Club Foot Orchestra. Also a composer for film, video, multimedia, and opera. Also a freelance writer. Also...

Rick Right (flamingo guitar, frighteningly accurate vocals) - for years best known as the male half of Rick & Ruby, he came into his own as a solo stand-up musical comedian at LA's Comedy Store, on MTV, and in comedy clubs and concerts across the country and overseas. He is currently based in London.

Jeffrey Kane, R.I.P. (lead guitar, hot moves, merely frightening vocals) - tours with Russ Tolman (ex-True West) and Joey Cheezhee & the Velveata Underground. Jeff also has swept several audience members off their respective feet and onto each others' with his heavy metal arrangement of "Alone Again (Naturally)". Jeff died in June, 2012, thus becoming the Yoko Ono of the group.

Dave Jess (bass guitar) - '60s throwback.

Eric "Cymbal-Head" Grothkopp (drums) - can play anything from weddings to Chinese funerals to big band to Stravinsky, yet keeps coming back to The STUPEDS. Why is this?

and, of course, the lovely and talented and extremely smart Idiettes Savantes:

Laurie Amat (vocals, hair) - featured in such Bay Area musical theater phenomena as Deer Rose, The Rocky Horror Show, Dick Dines Out, George Coates' Actual Sho, and Victor Spiegel's Mangoid Opera. She has produced several installments of Out of Hiding, a recital of contemporary music by real live local composers, and collaborated with The Residents on many projects including the live staging of Freak Show in Prague.

O-Lan Jones (vocals, reeds) - award-winning composer, stage and screen actor, playwright, singer and director, O-Lan is a founding member of both Overtone Industries and Pulp Playhouse, and performed in the world premi(r)re of Beth Henley's Abundance. Films include The Truman Show, Mars Attacks!, Natural-Born Killers, Lonesome Dove, Married To The Mob, and Edward Scissorhands.

not to mention the exciting return of The Brassholes:

Sheldon Brown (saxes, flute, clarinet) - I met him when he was in Maryann Price & The Millionaires. He has since gone on to much critical and little financial acclaim with Club Foot Orchestra, Omar Sosa, The Ensemble Brothers, SF Klezmer Experience, Harry "The Hipster" Gibson, and others too obscure to mention.

Doug Morton (trumpet, French horn, horn, dance captain) - when I first added horns, I got Shelley from the Millionaires and borrowed Josh Ende and Opter Flame from Club Foot Orchestra (I believe, although I'm not certain, that this is how Shelley made the Club Foot connection). Opter showed up for the photo session, then took one look at the set list and bowed out. Shelley offered Doug as a last-minute replacement, and he's been with us ever since.

Danny Bittker (saxes) - Sub superb — met him when he was subbing for Club Foot, then he subbed in a Tango No. 9 show, and now after subbing for Josh Ende (who has retired, apparently) he is now The Guy To Sub For at last. How proud he must be.

Nearly every song The STUPEDS have ever done,

plus a few we were planning on doing but never got around to
Now with some amusing anecdotes!

A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You
Aaaah-Ah, Yawa Em Ekat Ot Gnimoc Er'yeht
ABC 16
Achy-Breaky Heart8

(Where the) Action (Is) 16
Afternoon Delite 3
All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth
— Before retiring, Josh Ende used to remove his two false front teeth before singing this. It did not affect his impression of the Spike Jones original in the least — that still sucked — it was just gross.
All Right Now
Almost Cut My Hair
Alone Again (Naturally) 15
America (N. Diamond)
American Pie 14
American Woman 14
Anaheim, Azusa & Cucamonga Sewing Circle, Book Review & Timing Association 14
— Ray Hanna repeatedly quit the group over this song's inclusion in our repertoire.
Arizona 14
Atlantis

 

Baby I'm-a Want You
Baby One More Time8

Bad Case of Loving You
Bad, Bad Leroy Brown 3
— not exactly a STUPEDS anecdote, but my most memorable rendition of this one was at the Red Chimney in Stoneston Shopping Center, where I held down a weekly Thursday gig with Dick Bright & the Hi-Balls, and one night Dick's dad, Bob, sang this with us. We still honor that version by trying to recapture the unique way Bob sucker-punched the word "damn" in "whole damn town".
Ballad of the Green Berets
Banana Split For My Baby
— Pristeen Condition, R.I.P., would come on stage in a hideous insurance salesman type suit, begin singing this Louis Prima classic, and proceed to act out the lyrics by dumping ice cream, chocolate syrup, whipped cream, crushed nuts, and a maraschino cherry on his head.
Bang Bang
Barbie Girl8

Beach Baby 4
The Beat Goes On
Beep Beep
Believe8

Ben 3
Bernadette 13
Big Shot 11
Billy, Don't Be A Hero 3
Black & White
Blind Man in the Bleachers
Blue Christmas
Bohemian Rhapsody 16
– we used to do just the hard part (anecdote to an anecdote: On Live Killers, Queen's live album, the liner notes go to tedious lengths to describe the band's staging of this song, culminating in (I paraphrase): "Queen has too much integrity to resort to tapes in their live show. To recreate this only-in-the-studio section, the band leaves the stage and plays the record!!!" Well, hmph and double-hmph.) but then Ricky came up with this bitchin rockabilly version, so we start off with that.
Bonnie & Clyde
Boots
Born A Woman
Born To Be Wild
Bossa Nova Baby
Brand New Key

Brandy (You're A Fine Girl) 4
By The Time I Get To Phoenix 14

Calendar Girl — I believe somebody, maybe Ricky's old girlfriend, Righteous Royetta, used to do this as "Colander Girl" with the appropriate headwear.
California
Can't Get Enough of Your Love2

Can't Help Falling in Love With You
Candida 10
Candy Girl 1
Candyman 1
Captain Santa Claus (and His Reindeer Space Patrol)
— somehow this B-side doesn't get quite the airplay that it's flip, the original "Jingle Bell Rock", does.
Cherry Hill Park
Chic-a-Boom
Chicago 14
Chipmunks Song
— we've done this a number of ways: faithful to the original, Alvin-as-lounge-lizard, and also a Chipmunks version ("Are you ready, Simon? Garfunkel?") of "Sounds of Silence".
Chloe
Christmas Dinner Country Style
Christmas Tears
Christmastime is Here Again
Cold Kentucky Rain 14
Come Back When You Grow Up — Little Roger wore a trenchcoat and a lascivious grin on this one.
Come On Down To My Boat, Baby
Communication Breakdown
Country Roads 14
Crimson & Clover
— another non-STUPEDS story: the only time I was ever in a karaoke bar was for my sister's 50th birthday, and the only people in attendance were her, me, our friend Matthew, and the DJ. I chose this song for my karaoke debut, and it turned out to have the interminable and pointless wah-wah guitar solo in the middle, leaving me with nothing to do but practice pathetic Roger Daltrey mike moves.

 

Dancing Queen 18
Delaware 14
Delilah
Delta Dawn 14
Desiderata
Ding-Dong the Witch is Dead
Dirty Water
Disco Inferno 5
Dizzy
Do the Clam
Do the Freddie
Do Ya Think I'm Sexy? 17
Do You Feel Like I Do?
Do You Know the Way to San Jose? 14
Do You Know What I Mean? 13
Dominique
Don't Ask Me Why 11
Don't Get Hooked On Me
Don't Say Nothin' Bad About My Baby
Double Dutch Bus 2
Dreams of Everyday Housewives

 

Ebony Eyes
El Paso 14
El Watusi

Elusive Butterfly of Love 18
Emotional Rescue
Endless Love 6
England Swings
Epistle to Dippy
Eulogy
Eve of Destruction
Everybody Loves Somebody Sometime

Everything8a
Everything that Touches You
Express Yourself 2
Expressway to Your Heart

 

Faith 6
Feelings 3
Ferry Cross The Mersey 9
Fire 13
Float On2

Flying Saucer (Parts 1 & 2)
Foolish Little Girl
Footstomping Music
Forever in Blue Jeans
(a friend had gone to see Neil Diamond at Circle Star Theater, which isn't there anymore, but when it was there it had one of those turntable stages that slowly spin around, thus giving every audient an equal opportunity to gaze at the artist's butt -- hey, Neil subtitled Hot August Nights "love at the Greek", if you get my drift. Anyway, before I get even further sidetracked with the story about Rick & Ruby opening for Tony Orlando at Circle Star on the afternoon before Ricky got married, apparently Neil closed his show with a rousing rendition of his then-current hit, "Forever in Blue Jeans", bowed, walked up the aisle to his dressing room, the band quit vamping, the lights came up, the audience stood up and started putting on their coats … and then Neil came back to do an encore: a totally unsolicited reprise of "Forever in Blue Jeans". So one night at the Last Day Saloon we gave our lighting designer a coronary when we did a 20-minute version of the song, in every key, feel, tempo, and celebrity impression we could think of. Years later -- in 2004, as a matter of fact -- we stole the other part of Neil's schtick and waited until half the audience was out the door before we came back for our encore.)
Frankenstein
Freakazoid 6
Friday on my Mind
From Russia With Love 12
Funky Cold Medina2

Funkytown 6

 

Galveston 14
Game of Love
Georgy Girl
Get Down
Gimme Dat Ding
The Girl Is Mine 6
Girl Talk
Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon
Gloria 6
Golden Gate Park
Goldfinger 12
Gonna Make You Sweat8a

Good Lovin' 13
Good Thing
Good Times, Bad Times
Good Vibrations 13
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer
Grazin' In The Grass 2
Green Tambourine 18
Guantanamera
Gypsies, Tramps & Thieves 3

 

Hang On Sloopy 7
Hanky Panky 7
The Happening 2
Happy Organ
Happy Together
Hard Habit To Break 6
Haven't Got Time for the Pain
Havin' My Baby 3
He Hit Me
Heartbreak Hotel
Hello Goodbye 13
Hello, I Love You
Her Majesty 13
Hey Paula
Hi, Hi, Hi

Highway to Hell
Hocus Pocus
Hollywood Nights 14
Honey 1
Honolulu Lulu 14
Hound Dog
Houston 14
How Does That Grab Ya, Darlin'?
Hush

 

I Am The Walrus
I Am Woman
I Can Never Go Home Anymore
I Can See For Miles
I Dig Rock & Roll Music
I Don't Wanna Play House
I Got Rhythm — The Happenings' terrific pop arrangement
I Got You, Babe
I Just Called To Say I Love You2

I Just Want to Celebrate
I Know What Boys Like 6
I Like The Night Life 5
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
I Think I Love You
I Think We're Alone Now

I Touch Myself8
I Used to Live Here
I Wanna Rock'n' Roll All Nite
I Want Candy 1
I Was Kaiser Bill's Batman
I Will Always Love You8

I Will Survive 5
I Wouldn't Trade Christmas
I Write The Songs 3
I'm A Believer
I'm Henry The VIII, I Am 9
I'm Not A Juvenile Delinquent
I'm Not Lisa
I'm Telling You Now 9
I'm Too Sexy8

I've Never Been To Me
Ice Ice Baby8

If I Had a Hammer
In America not 14, incredibly
In The Year 2525 18
In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida
Incense & Peppermints
Indian Reservation 3
Indiana Wants Me 14
Informer8

Ironic8

It Must Be Him
It's My Party
Itchycoo Park

 

Jackson 14
Jailhouse Rock
James Bond Theme 12
Jingle Bell Rock
Jingle Bells (Singing Dogs)
Johnny Get Angry
Judy's Turn to Cry
Juicy Fruit 6
Just Checked In To See What Condition My Condition Was In
Just The Way You Are 11

Justify My Love 8

 

Kentucky Rain 14
Killing Me Softly With His Song2

Knock Three Times (On the Ceiling If You Want Me) 10
Kookie, Kookie (Lend Me Your Comb)
Kung Fu Fighting2

 

LA Is My Lady 14
La Bamba
La Vida Loca8

Lady Godiva
Lady Marmalade 5
Last Train to Clarksville
Laurie (Strange Things Happen)
Let 'Em In
Let's Get Physical
Let's Get Stupid
Let's Go Crazy
Let's Hang On
Lightning Strikes 15
Lightning's Girl
Like A Virgin 6
Little Becky's Christmas Wish
Little Bit O'Soul
Little Green Apples 14
Little Old Lady From Pasadena 14
Little St. Nick
Little Willie
Live & Let Die 12
Lollipop 1
Lonesome Cowboy
Louie, Louie 7
Love in an Elevator9a

Love Power
Love Rollercoaster2

Love To Love You, Baby 5
Lovin' Touchin' Squeezin'

Low Rider2

Lucretia McEvil

 

Macarena8

Macarthur Park
Macho Man 5, 18
Magic Carpet Ride

Martian Hop
Me & Mrs. Jones 2
Me & You & A Dog Named Boo 3
Merry Christmas, Darling
Mickey 6
Mill Valley 14
Mm Mm Mm Mm Mm8

Mm-Bop8

Monday, Monday 13
Monster 14
Monterey 14
The Morning After 3
Morning Train 6
Mr. Big Stuff2

Mr. Moonlight
Mr. Roboto 6
Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Daughter

Music Box Dancer
Music to Watch Girls By
Muskrat Love
My Boy Lollipop 1
My Coloring Book
My Ding-A-Ling 4
My Heart Will Go On8

My Love (Paul McCartney)
My Love (Petula Clark)
My Prerogative2

My Sharonna 16
My Way

 

Na-Na Hey-Hey Kiss Him Goodbye
The Name Game 18
Nasty2

Native New Yorker 14
New York's A Lonely Town 14
New York, New York 14
The Night Chicago Died 14
The Night The Lights Went Out In Georgia 14
Night Train 14
Nights In White Satin
(including the stupid "Breathe deep…" part) (in fact, we may have only done that part and bailed before we got to the song)
Nights on Broadway 14
Nobody Does It Better 12, 18
North To Alaska 14

 

Ode to Billy Joe
Ohio 14
Okie From Muskogee 14
On The Good Ship Lollipop used to be in 1
Once Upon A Time
Only In America
(I'm in love with the) Other Woman 6
Over & Over

 

Palisades Park
Past Present Future
Peaches En Regalia
Philadelphia Freedom 6
Piano Man
Pictures of Matchstick Men
Pillow Talk2

Pineapple Princess
Pleasant Valley Sunday 14, 15
Please Come To Boston 14
Pop Muzik
Pour Some Sugar On Me 1
Pretty Ballerina
Psychedelic Shack2

Pump Up The Volume 6
Pusher Man
Put Your Hand in the Hand

 

Rag Doll
The Rain, the Park (and Other Things)
Rapture 6
Reach Out of the Darkness
Red River Rock
Reflections
Respect Yourself2

Ring My Bell2

Ringo 18
Rivers of Babylon
Rock & Roll All Night
Rock & Roll Heaven
Rock Me, Amadeus 6
Rock On
Rock'n'Roll, Part 2
Rocky Mountain High 14
Rocky Mountain Way 14
Rosalita 13
Roseanna
Ruby Red Dress
Run Rudolph Run
Runnin' Away

Rush Rush8a

 

San Francisco (Wear Some Flowers In Your Hair) 14
Santa Bring My Baby Back To Me
Santa Claus is Back in Town
Santa Claus is Coming (4 Seasons)
Santa Claus is Watching You
Santa Looked a lot like Daddy
Satisfaction (à la Residents)
Saturday In The Park
Saturday Nite
School's Out
Seasons in the Sun
Seattle 14
Seven Little Girls
Sex Machine 2
Shaft 2
Shattered
Short Shorts
Signs 3
Smokin' in the Boys' Room
Snoopy vs. the Red Baron
Snoopy's Xmas
Something Tells Me I'm Into Something Good
Something Stuped 7
Speed Racer
Stairway To Heaven
Stand 16
Still Rock 'n' Roll To Me 11
Stop, Stop, Stop
Strangers in the Night
Street Fighting Man
Substitute
Sugar Shack 1
Sugar, Sugar  1, 18
Sugartime  1
Sugartown 1
Summer in the City
Sunshine Superman
Sunshine, Lollipops  1
Surfin' Bird
Susan
Sussudio 6
Swingin' School
Sylvia's Mother

 

Tallahassee Lassie 14
Tan Shoes & Pink Shoe Laces
Tear The Roof off the Sucker 5
Thank God I'm A Country Boy 17
That's The Way (Uh-huh, Uh-huh) I Like It 5
They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-Haaaa! 18

This Diamond Ring
This Guy's In Love With You
Thunderball 12
Tie A Yellow Ribbon 10
To All The Girls I've Loved Before
(with Ricky singing both Willie's and Julio's parts) 6
To Sir With Love
Tommy's Holiday Camp
(actually, for a Fleet Week show whose theme was "Woodschlock", we worked up versions of songs by most of the Woodstock artists, including a 6-minute reduction of the entire "Tommy" opera)
Tom's Diner8a

Total Eclipse of the Heart
Touch Me
TSOP 5
Tub-Thumping8

Turning Japanese 6

 

Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey

Under Pressure8a
Uptown Girl
Valley of the Dolls
Venus
(I think we did both the Shocking Blue and Bobby Rydell versions, but maybe the Rydell was just for a Last Prom)
Viva Las Vegas 14, 16
Volare

 

Walk Like An Egyptian 6
Walk Right In
Walkin' To New Orleans 6
Wannabe8

Warm San Francisco Nights 14, 16
Watching Scotty Grow
Waterloo
We Ain't Got Nothin' Yet
We Are The Champions
We Love You
We're An American Band 14
Western Union
What's New Pussycat
Whatcha See Is Whatcha Get
Whatever Happened to Christmas?
Where the Boys Are
Whip It
White Drunks On Polk
(a cunning satire on the Tubes' "White Punks on Dope" with the lyrics cleverly rewritten about The Palms, a San Francisco club that closed more than ten years ago)
Wichita Lineman
Wild Thing 7
Winchester Cathedral
Wipe Out
With a Little Help From My Friends
Wives & Lovers
Woodstock 14
The Words Get Stuck In My Throat (love theme from War of the Gargantuas)
The Worst That Could Happen

 

Yellow Submarine
Yo Yo
You Don't Own Me
You Light Up My Life 3
You Only Live Twice 12
You'd Better Sit Down Kids
You're a Native New Yorker 14
You're So Vain 3
You're the One That I Want
Young Girl
Yummy, Yummy, Yummy

2 Legit 2 Quit8a

24 Hours From Tulsa 14
59th St. Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy)
5:00 World
500 Miles
6:00
96 Tears (Too Many Teardrops) 7
98.6
99 Balloons 6

Although The STUPEDS are not afraid to drive audiences to distraction by playing songs in their entirety, some of the above are abbreviated and assembled into one or more of the following:

1 - Diabetes Medley
2 - Soul Medley
3 - 70s Medley
4 - Songs We Left Out of "The 70s Medley" Medley, which is usually followed by
5 - Disco Medley
6 - 80s Medley
7 - Three-Chord Medley (Tribute To The Proto-Minimalists)
8 - 90s Medley
8a - 90s Medley (first draft)
9 - English Medley
10 - Tony Orlando Medley
11 - Billy Joel Medley (a/k/a "It's Still Billy Joel To Me")
12 - James Bond Medley
13 - Songs That Stop Medley
14 - I Hear America Retching Medley
15 - The Usual Opening Medley
16 - The Usual Closing Medley
17 - Do Ya Thank God I'm A Sexy Country Boy
18 - The Ten Worst Songs We Could Get The Rights To In A Minute And A Half Medley (a/k/a "Love Theme from Martians, Go Home
")

Many
(not all. But if your name isn't here and should be, by all means let me know; this [12/16/04 -- hey, happy Beethoven's birthday! -- revised 2/23/12] version is completely from memory)
of the hundreds of musicians who have passed through the band
in a manner not unlike a gall stone passing through urethra:

bass:
David (Jeff) Sampson, a/k/a Sammy Stuped
Stu "Ped" Feldman a/k/a "And Stu"
Robin Sylvester
Stu D. Baker
Hillary Stench Hanes
Rick Anderson
Richard Bob Greene
Reid Whatley (or was it drums?)
Steve Kirk (I missed that gig)
Maurice "Mac" Cridlin
Gil Roman,
who was in a 60s band called Gunhill Road
Anders Rundblad

guitar:
Greg Davidson
Alex Guiness
David-Martin Van Overveen
Terry Medeiros
Bill Spooner
Peter "Flaco" Siegel (pedal steel)
Petey Walsh

drums:
Gary Silvestri a/k/a "Ferny"
Ed Berman
Mark Brandt
Spencer Dryden
(who would crumple up the chart and toss it over his shoulder as each song ended), R.I.P.
Michael (not Dale -- that was his dad) McCraven
Reid Whatley (or was it bass?)
Richard Yungclas, R.I.P.
Prairie Prince
Ihor Pacholuk
from Denim TV (he only played with us once -- his bass pedal broke in the middle of the first song and my voice went out in the middle of the second, and we still had a 45-minute set to finish)

Brassholes:
Joshua Ende, Brasshole emeritus
Opter Flame (photo session only)
Michael Moore
(no, not that Michael Moore, and not the other one, either)
Ernie Mansfield

Idiettes
(not, the current girls insist on clarifying, Savantes):
Monica "Ruby" Ganas as Mrs. Martha "Please don't call me Marti" Becker, ur
-Idiette
Maryann Price
Naomi Ruth Eisenberg
Ray Hanna (I think he also played keys on one gig I couldn't make)
Annie Stocking, a/k/a Sharon Apartment
Jeanette Sartain, a/k/a Lisa Carr
Trish Robbins
Brittany Barthelme
Katy Did
Brian Lohmann
Robert Madden
Andi Matheny a/k/a Righteous Royetta
Lisa Gold (dancing only)
Rusty Poehner
two Residents (dancing only)
Jo-Carol Block/Davidson, R.I.P.
Susan Brecht

guests:
Michael Peppe (claims to have sung Bohemian Rhapsody with us once, and who am I to doubt him?)
Little Roger Clark
Dick Bright
Peter Bilt
Maryedith Burrell
Merle Kessler
Bermuda Schwartz
Matthew Perifano
Doug Ferrari
Bob Sarlatte
Michael Pritchard
Barry Sobel
Tom Kenny
Amyellyn Kessler
Dave Terry
Bill Allard
The Dotes: Mairzy, Dozey, and little Lambsy D'Ivey
Lester Poehner
Barbara Scott
Bill Kirchenbauer
Pauly Shore
another Resident
I Fratelli Bologna
Mark Pitta
Dave Chapelle
Jose Simon
Pristeen Condition
Janie Bob Scott
Linda "Big Lou" Seekins
Those Darned Accordions
The Los Trancos Woods Marching Band
Pat Driscoll and his wonderful 16mm film, Stupids Anomanus
Bill Murray (this is kind of a cheat: he showed up at one of our gigs and afterwards took us out for sushi, and on the way out of the restaurant he started singing "Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)" and we … well, the uncharitable version of the story is merely "and we sang along", but damn, we knew that song backwards and forwards and I'd submit that our impromptu a capella rendition was a little more, um, substantial than just your garden-variety Singing Along Drunkenly. Although sake did play a significant part in this anecdote…) (follow-up anecdote: He recommended us to Atlantic Records to play their 40th anniversary party at Roseland Dance Hall in New York. Atlantic thought he wanted us to play back-up for him, so they readily agreed. Turns out he wasn't even planning on attending the thing, just was trying to toss us a favor, but it became mired in complications and misunderstandings. We finally did play, but the sign on our dressing room said "Bill Murray's band" and everyone there, including Ahmet Ertegun and Robert Plant, seemed kinda bemused by us. We got a great videotape out of it, though.)
Dr. Gonzo
Katie O'Neil (yeah, she's one of the Dotes, but she also did a couple of solos)
Dan "Dr. Science" Coffey
"Country" Joe McDonald and Mimi Fariña
(they did a duet on "Hey, Paula", and Joe also did a trombone solo on a blues number … did you know Country Joe played trombone? Hey, all of a sudden it occurs to me that some of the names and songs on this webpage may actually have been from one of Rick & Ruby's Last Proms, which often featured a rhythm section that in some years bore a strong, nay, unmistakable resemblance to -- but was not actually -- The STUPEDS. Oh, well.) (Oh, and for my wife's birthday party I put together something called The Band Of A Thousand Dances, with Rick & Ruby, John Hanes on drums, Chauncey Berry on bass, Ralph Carney on reeds, and Big Lou on accordion, but that wasn't exactly The STUPEDS either.)
Steve Pearl
Steve Kravitz
Cynthia Szegeti
Cintra Wilson
Monty Hoffman
(rehearsed, but never showed up for the gig)
that girl in LA Ricky found to do a dance to "Music Box Dancer"
Bobby Weinstein
the lighting guy at the Comedy Store who fancied himself a heavy metal guitar player, thus giving us an excuse to learn "School's Out"
the guy we got to sit in on banjo on the Hollies' "Stop Stop Stop"
-- oh, no, wait, that was Ricky. We just borrowed the banjo from Josh Ende's roommate.
Jay David (o.k., he didn't play drums for The STUPEDS -- that was a Last Prom -- but he did sit in with us once on his old band's big hit, "Sylvia's Mother".  I think. Or maybe we just talked about it.)

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