BOOM.   BOOM.         BOOM!!!!!!!!

Yes, kids. It's back. It's the most legendary party in the UNIVERSE, having lain dormant in hibernation for nearly two years. You guessed it...

GEEKFEST

X

WHOO-HOO!!!!!

Ah, yes. It is, at last, another GeekFest, the 10th one. Yay. You were starving, tired, poor, a huddled mass yearning to be free. You had hoped. You had dreamed. You had sold your little sister into white slavery hoping to earn enough to bribe Andy Damick into having another one. But NOW, ALL THE WAITING IS OVER. YOU ARE ABOUT TO BE SATISIFIED. STAND BACK. STAND BACK. KEEP YOUR PANTS ABOUT YOU. ABOUT YOU.

	WHEN:	7PM-ish, Septempter 10th, 1999 A.D.

	WHERE:	The SEKRIT KAVE OF B. KEITH RICHARDS.  Directions
		are detailed below.  Keep watching.  Keep waiting.
		Keep dreaming.  KEEP YOUR FRICATIVES OUT OF THE
		PEANUT BUTTER!

	WHAT:	GeekFest X.  To celebrate the now-almost-forgotten
		GENERATION X.  We are being overtaken by Generation
		Y (Y?  Because we LIKE YOU!!).  (That's right, kids,
		we're talking the Britney Spears Generation.)  So,
		saddle up, get your '80s pop culture on, and bring 
		out yer dead, bring out yet booze, bring out yer 
		chips, bring out yer freshly-caught freshmen, 
		redeemable for fine prizes and fine cocktails.  
		Females are worth double coupons!  Act now!

	HOW:	As always, this is BYO*.  If you want it there,
		you will bring it.  (I want Britney Spears there.
		I will be bringing her.)

	WHO:	You, along with anyone else who hears about this
		here shindig.  This is gonna rock, boiz and goils,
		so bring yourself and your front porch and all the
		dogs you ever loved.

GET! YOUR! GROOVE! ON! And COME ON OUT to the GEEKFEST! IT'S ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE! DON'T MISS YOUR CHANCE TO HAVE YOUR FACE SPLAYED ALL OVER THE MOVIE POSTERS FOR THE PHANTOM MENACE PARODY!

Tickets will be taken at the door. Admission is free, but requires a promise of 213 hot Latina women to the son of the mother of the bride's dog's owner's kittens' rug-maker's ex-lover's cousin. (IYKWIM.) Naked photos of Andy Simmons's dog will be available in the lobby following the show.

Directions to GeekFest X (courtesy B. Keith Richards):

From NCSU take GORMAN ST. About a 1 mile after Avent Ferry there will be an Exxon station and a stop light. Take a LEFT at the light onto THISTLEDOWN DR. Drive all the way down until you get to TRAILWOOD DR. Take a RIGHT onto TRAILWOOD. You will cross I-40 then take the first LEFT onto LINEBERRY RD. Take the immediate left into MELROSE APTS. Go to the right of the Guard House and dial 128 to get let in. Go in and veer right. The second building on the right is 6. Park. Take the rightmost staircase in building 6 and look for the geeks in apt. 623.

For the love of Smerp, COME TO THE GEEKFEST!