You asked,  What is love?” 
 

 

My first thought was to think of the well known lines from I Corinthians 13. One could never speak of love without thinking of the first lover, God.  God loved us, created us and through His love we are able to rise above the erotic loves or the filial loves to agape.  So by the gift of God we are moved to a level where our spirits commingle and we, while separate, become as one.  Just as the caterpillar must trust in the impossible to weave a tiny cocoon, thus dying to self for a moment in time, in order to become the beautiful butterfly, we, too, must throw off the selfish, to become the person we are capable of being in the love of ourselves and our fellow voyagers in this world.

 

Love is about relationships as I believe everything in life is.  Our relationships include our relationships between ourselves and our world, nature, our families, friends, our lovers, our pets, our God and so on.  But in this case, I will speak only to my relationship with you, my lover or perhaps, my lover to be.

 

Do you have books or stories that just spoke to your heart on multiple levels?  I want to share mine with you.  And I hope that somehow you will understand me better. I remember C.S. Lewis’ comment in describing friendship that friends were as 2 persons sitting side by side looking outward and asking “do you see the same truth?”  (The Four Loves) He spoke of lovers as two persons facing one another absorbed in one another.  I have never been able to conceive of a love relationship that behaved wholly as lovers or wholly as friends by his description but rather was a joyful celebration of both.

 

Such a relationship is not achieved in a day or a month but is an ongoing process involving communication, discovery and experience.  It is a process of building trust between two persons one day at a time.  One of my favorite books, The Little Prince, addresses this process in the simplest of ways, describing a little boy taming a fox.  The two meet every day in a meadow starting far apart and drawing closer day by day until at last they are standing close to one another.  In a very simplistic way, we are shown a process of building trust which is totally necessary for intimacy and, of course, love.  At the end of this very simple story, the fox states what he calls a secret.  The secret is that we are forever responsible for those whom we have tamed, for those whom we have encouraged to believe and trust in us.  So love between two persons intimately involves the building of trust and an acceptance of their mutual responsibility one for another.  We say one to another: “I love you.  I accept your love.  I trust you. I will behave in a loving way toward you.  I share who I am with you and I trust you to take care of that vulnerable person that is me whom I offer you and in addition, I will take care of the wonderful, vulnerable person who you are.” 

 

 

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
10 but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

 

http://www.mindspring.com/~mshall/stories/little.htm