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Theatre OUTlanta created theatre from the perspectives of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered and queer people, theatre that worked to reflect the many different experiences of lgbtq people and to build bridges within both the lgbtq community and the wider community.

©2006 by Theatre OUTlanta

What's In A Name?

Partner. Girlfriend. Boyfriend. Husband. Wife. Lover.

What other names have you heard? What names do you like? What names do you dislike? What names do you think are silly? At Atlanta's Pride in 2005, we wore sandwich boards with different names for that special person in our lives and asked these questions. Our goal was to use the responses as the starting place for developing a theatre piece.

Some of the responses we got
to plaything
to husband/wife
to partner
to friend
to girlfriend/boyfriend
to significant other
to sweetie
to roommate
to lover
plus other names people suggested

responses to PLAYTHING:
--I'm a person, not a thing, but playing is fun.
--Hell, yeah!
--I love this! Fun, carefree relationship
--How about that?!
--Which one?
--Play safe with your plaything!

responses to HUSBAND / WIFE
--They're so boring. They're what everybody uses. Why do we have to try and be like straight people?
--I'm the wife. She's the spouse. [her spouse adds:] The butch.
--I'd only say husband if we'd had a ceremony.
--Reminds me of my parents
--Wives are ex's!
--Anything but "husband" [written a woman]
--Anything but WIFE!! [written by a woman]
--Never wife, husband yes
--My best friend
--A temporary solution for loneliness and half the bills
--My heart
--Wife-too stereotypical-we are life partners
--Husband and wife are too common, WE need to be original!
--Husband sounds cheesy
--Just for breeders
--I call her my "husboi"; it just fits
--This is my baby. Love him!
--Happy wife to us!
--Husband-it gives him the respect he deserves
--My partner calls me his husband to differentiate me from his business partner.
--I don't like "wife" or "husband" because they're historically related to ownership, not love.
--My girl. My love. My life. Not my wife.
--[written underneath] Thank you!

responses to PARTNER
--Sex Partner [friend adds: I never thought of that. 1st man: How many partners have you had? Friend: Not very many.]
--It pretty much sums it up. It's not gender specific.
--This is what HIV educators use for people you have sex with
--Bullshitter
--Creep
--The person I'm sharing the rest of my life with!!
--Rundi
--Love
--Commitment
--Business
-- I'm not in a law firm with her! Jeez!
--Asshole
--Butterflies You're too scared to say lover
--Square dancing

responses to FRIEND
--Amigo
--Denial
--Fake
--Really a trick
--My bubba!
--Cop out
--Fear
--Lame
--Family's shame and secrecy
--Prijatelj
--Seems distant. My girlfriend/wife/partner is more than a friend
--Complicated
--My grandmother's reference to be polite and not to assume sex
--Sarcasm
--Roommate
--My mother used to introduce us as "my daughter and her special friend" and then she said "companion"-- everyone who went through the receiving line at my grandmother's funeral was introduced to me and my "companion"-- and now she mostly says "partner," but the last time we were visiting, she actually used "wife"

responses to GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND
--I teach and I say my partner, which bothers one little girl. She says, why can't you just say girlfriend? I tell her she's more than that.
--say girlfriend because that's what she is
--Not very committed sounding
--My girlfriend used to call me her boyfriend, now I'm her girlfriend
--Will you be my girlfriend? Check one: yes or no
--The person I'm in love with
--New, temporary, short term
--Not permanent
--Vomit. . . I don't need a gf. I need an assistant . . . aka . . . lover.
--Are we in high school?
--Better than partner
--Want one!
--Go back to Brazil!
--This is my boyfriend this week
--Catch of the week

responses to SIGNIFICANT OTHER
--She's significant to me

responses to SWEETIE
--That's what I call everyone
--Everyone is a sweetie!
--Just broke up with a great guy because he wouldn't stop calling me "Sweetie"
--[written below] Lucky to have someone who cared so much
--That's my boo?
--That's what my mom calls me!
--Glad someone cares that way about me!

responses to ROOMMATE
--Ambiguous
--Discomfort
--Lack of honesty
--Secret lesbian lover
--Protection

responses to LOVER
--bedtime play partner
--Gabby
--Too 70's
--Or 80's
--Sex
--Not to my family
--Fuck
--This [the word fuck] cheapens the word lover
--Sleazy
--Motel
--Stopped saying this for a long time, but recently decided I like it better than partner, because it talks about love
--Single
--Temporary
--Temporary
--Talented
--Pensacola
--Like it a lot! Prefer it over wife.
--Pride . . . anywhere
--Sexual, not in a relationship
--Pensacola Memorial Weekend
--Sat. nights
--Too personal of a word
--"on the side"
--long term
--intimate
--No commitment
--More than committed, justified
--A little more than dating
--Just one of many
--Intimate
--Angelina Jolie
--Partner is permanent
--Better than "partner"

OTHER NAMES PEOPLE SUGESTED:
--Whore
--Spouse
--Toy
--Pleasure Partner
--Fuck toy
--Bitch
--My girl
--My heart
--We go together
--My uh, uh . . . you know
--Hubby/partner
--Husboi
--My better 1/2!
--Honey
--Spouse Equivalent
--Spousal unit
--My bitch
--I don't use any words