Our Family: aka The Looney Bin

Remember the mice slaughter of a few weeks ago... I just thought I was up close and personal with nature.

A couple of evenings ago, David was out working on the lawnmower (and now has it FIXED, Hallelujah!!), while I decided to collect eggs from the chickens and remove a box from one coop. I walked into the Americana pen, lifted up the box lid to check for eggs before removing it, and alas, NO eggs. Wait a sec... I only had one egg from them yesterday...anyway, as I lowered the lid I saw behind the box, against the fence a large snake coiled up. My recollection is slightly fuzzy here, but I somehow scooped up three chickens on my way out yelling sh*t, sh*t, sh*t!!! I threw them out and turned to grab the remaining chicken, but being a smart hen, she had followed me out. Meanwhile, David is asking, "What?!" while I tried not to hyperventilate. Now, you should know that I am not normally scared of snakes. We see little ones fairly often in the garden or grass. I saw a garter across the street in the woods once and of course the green snake in the tree that KJ and I photographed. This however, took me completely by surprise and it was a BIG snake. I walked around to the back of the pen where I could get a better look at the snake to see if it was one of the four venomous kinds known to our area. (Yes, I have memorized those.) When I hollered to David that a snake was in the coop, he came over giving me that "I'm sure you're freaking out about a tiny snake look." He took a look and did a calm manly freak out. "Oh my goodness! What kind is it?" I knew it was nonvenomous, but didn't know what kind. We being who we are, didn't want to kill the snake, just get it back into the woods where it could go do snakey things and stay AWAY from the chicken coop. Problem #1 - how to get said snake out of the coop. I rounded up the Americanas and put them in an old rabbit hutch for safekeeping while David pondered the problem. Plan A - His answer was to spray the snake with starter fluid that he had been using on the lawnmower. He said that he thought it had ether in it so maybe it would put the snake to sleep. Before I let him try though, I had to run inside and get KJ so he could see the snake. I know, a typical homeschooler... Anyway, the snake did NOT go to sleep when sprayed with starter fluid. He quickly climbed up the side of the pen where he managed to tie himself in a big knot around the fence just below the ceiling. (FYI - ceiling is only about 4 feet high). We can now see that the snake is about 4 1/2 feet long. Plan B - David stands at the back of the pen and sprays the snake with the water hose while KJ and I watch from the front to see if the snake comes down. There was a tarp that came down over the side which is why no one stood there...also because the snake was on the side fence. After much spraying, the snake vomits up what looks like several raw eggs. Yuck! More spraying...more spraying, except for swaying his head back and forth, the snake is not budging. Plan C - David and I very carefully lift up the tarp and toss it on the roof so we can see the snake from the side. David found an old rain wand that attaches to the hose and uses it to try and hook the snake to pull it loose from the fence. After working at it for several minutes, the snake finally has enough and climbs down, back inside the coop though. sigh.. David starts spraying the snake with the water hose some more and finally the snake made a run for it. He ran. (do snakes run?) I guess I should say he slithered out extremely quickly heading right for the large oak tree that is about 2 feet from the coop. He started up the trunk of the tree. David is trying to spray the snake and yells, "Don't let him get up that tree!!" I throw a stick and miss. KJ who for some reason is carrying a 4 foot long 1'x1' piece of wood sheathing, hands it to me and whack! I knock the snake off the trunk. David yells, "That's the way to do it!" The snake heads back up the trunk. I knock it back off. It heads back up. I knock it back off. It heads back up. I knock it back off. Finally it heads away...right towards the rabbit hutch. I yelled, "Watch out KJ!" and whacked that snake from the side. He flew through the air and landed about 5 feet away. Meanwhile David had come running over to us. He grabbed the stick from me and kept the snake moving for the woods. Once it got to the woods, do you think it went off like a good little snake? Noooo, it just sat there looking at David and trying to bite him. David said, "I think it is just waiting for us to leave so it can return to the coop." After some deliberation, we decided that the snake was probably going to keep eating the eggs, so David chopped its head off with a hoe. Afterwards we all sat down at the kitchen table and perused KJ's Reptiles and Amphibians: Eastern and Central North American field guide to discover what kind of snake it was. It turned out to be a Texas Rat Snake.

Please forgive my mixing of tenses in the above narrative.

That night, I couldn't get to sleep so I read the entire snake section of the field guide trying to become familiar with those snakes that are found in our area.