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And so we finally realize that we are gay and we will never be anything else but gay so we begin to look for that person with whom we can share our lives. Ah, as if that would be so simple. Nothing in life is simple. When you are straight, you can consider every single person of the opposite sex an option as a mate. Not so for a person who is gay. It is just not that simple. If the statistics are true, then 10-20% of the population is gay. That means that 10-20% of the single same sex population is a possible option. Did you ever try to figure out who was gay and who was straight in a large group. Not easy was it.

So why do most gay people go to bars? Duhhh. Maybe we want to find some one. Maybe we are tired of being alone. So we go. And we meet someone and someone else and someone else. Now we were all raised with a set of ethics that had to do with dating. The RIGHT way. We know what is right and we know what is wrong. Please be aware that gays come from ALL parts of society .We are all colors, all cultures and all religions. We also live all levels of ethical and moral behavior. Just like straight people. So finding the person who matches OUR concept of morality and ethical behavior becomes even more difficult, no matter what you are looking for.

Oh, it is easy to find someone to have sex with. SEX SEX SEX You can have sex with anyone if you both choose. But to find your soul mate. Ah, there is the rub. So for those of you who are hoping to really settle down, this is your page.

It is unwise to lie to or deceive potential dates. They will never trust you later if they turn out to be THE ONE.

It is unwise to push a relationship for sex too early. There are times when some want sex and only sex(not wise today). For the most part, remember that your partner will think of you as a "piece of meat" if you treat him or her that way. Rarely do relationships based upon that alone last. In the straight world, where there are children, many couples who made the same choices stay together "for the children" , but not forever. You will probably not be creating anything like that together.

So, the behaviors that you exhibit in the beginning will usually set the tone for the relationship.

Do not just "settle" for someone because there is no one else. You will both end up unhappy.

You will be most happy with someone who shares your values, hopes and dreams and wants to pursue them WITH you.

So, go find that fun person who really understands, accepts and loves you.

Addendum: I have added some rules for dating that are practical and humorous:

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