Bullets rang out all around the hearse, everybody ducked. Tracy was a little slow, trying valiantly to shield Suze. She fell to the ground with a thud, face down on the pavement. Knight and Schanke vamped out and fought the oncoming fire and overcame two orange clad hunters in the bushes.
"This is what you wanted!" Suze accused, looking down at Tracy, and then up at Karies.
"Oh, Man, no way! I told you all hell would break loose once I started using those damn emoticons. Oh ... Darkness! She's ... wearing a light blue ribbed knit sweater ... it's fashion death if nothing else, will the stylists never learn?"
"Tracy?" Knight was by her side. "Tracy, it's over, get up."
"I'm a good cop, I'm a good cop, I'm a good c-c-c-c-c-c-c---o-o-o-o-ppp." A metal upon metal grinding sound pierced through the air and Tracy stared blankly ahead.
"Where is that slacker when we need him?" Knight cursed.
"Slacker? Did somebody say Slacker?" Vachon dropped to the ground. His hair flying all about.
"Eeeeew, MAN! You got your hair in my coffee, jeeeeez," Karies complained.
"Sorry," Vachon apologized, like a gentleman. "Let me closer, Knight."
Nick moved aside and Vachon held Tracy's shoulders, and looked into her eyes. He blinked slowly, like a sandy camera shutter. A loud whirring noise started up, and Tracy snapped back to life. "Vachon! You're evil, I can feel it!" she spoke, perkily. Vachon chuckled.
"C'mon, Trace, I think we better get you back to the shop."
"Not so fast, Vachon!" The Inca hissed, his eyes glowing like coals.
"My Brother!" Vachon grinned.
"You have invaded me for long enough, it is time for you to goo as our Great Mother fished."
"Oh, golly, Bro, you're having trouble with you closed captioning?" Vachon purred sympathetically.
"Ever since you first invaded me!" The Inca spat out.
"Oh, no way? Man, I had no idea," Vachon said. "I thought you were hounding me all this time over that four hundred thousand pesos I bet you that I'd outlive you in our battle. Wow. You're still infected by the sap from the branch of the Great Mother's mulberry bush I speared you with. We can cure your problem with a small bit of blood sipped from the Black Swan of the Lake."
"I get first dibs at that baby!" a voice came from the parking lot.
"Dr. Lambert, my snarky Goddess, I would never interfere with your work." Vachon turned to Natalie, looking innocent.
"Can it, Slacker," Nat barked. "Where's Nick?"
"Oh Gawd, it's Nat!" Knight cowered behind the hearse. "Tell her ... tell her I'm gone, Schank."
"What do you want me to tell her, Knight? That you're hot on the trail, `cause you're not."
"I don't care, Schank, tell her I've gone off on a wild goose chase, just get rid of her!" Knight whooshed away.
"Hey, Natalie!" Schanke popped out from behind the hearse, his voice squeaking. "Boy, am I glad to see you. You know, I gotta tell you, working with Knight is sure a one man job. Heh. Uhm, he ran off, never said where to, same ole same ole."
could be--"
"I know, I know, Natalie, we're doing our best here. C'mon, let's call for some local back-up to pick up these morons and get a sketch artist down here. You can give us a description of the Black Swan, right, Suze?"
"Uhm ... sure ... but ..."
"No buts, this is Detective Don Schanke you're dealing with."
"Yeah ... but ... uhm, it's a Black Swan."
"Hey, Vera, long time no talk," Schanke spoke into the phone, ignoring Suze. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine, hey listen, we need somebody local down here to----" Schanke's voice trailed off as he and Nat walked away.
"Hey, where's Vachon and Tracy?" Suze asked.
"Blink and they're here. Blink and they're there," The Inca said.
"Will you pulllleeeeeese just shut up until we get you a cup of Goose?" Karies bitched.
"Swan, Karies."
"Suze, do I look like I care?'
"Uhm ... actually ... kinda." Suze grinned, evilly.
"Let's go inside, we are supposed to be at the party."
"Flashback Ball," Suze corrected.
"I'm catching it from Inca." Karies feigned choking. They giggled.
"Oooooh, everybody looks so nice!" Suze commented as they entered the Ball.
"Look, half the people are like, lining up over there," Karies said, a concerned expression marring her features. "It's the people with the Toronto cops, they're like ... well, look, they're grilling those folks about what they're wearing, and staring at them. Who do they think they are, Judge and Jury?"
"Right now we are!" A huge cop stalked across the floor towards the new arrivals.
"Oh, hell. Does my voice really carry that much?" Karies whispered.
"Shush," The Inca whispered. Karies glared at him.
The cop came closer, slow moving and ominous. "Oh, no! Uh-Uh! Don't do it, man." He reached Karies and engulfed her in a bear like hug. "Uhg, I asked ya not to do this, Stonetree. You don't hug a person, you surround 'em, it's like some kinda bloody ritual thing, gets me all goosebumpy."
Stonetree grinned, and backed away facing Suze and embraced her with a similar hug, Suze hugged him back. The Inca hid behind Karies. "It's good to see you, and Happy Birthday, Suze."
"Thanks for remembering."
"Hell, once you book a gal as sweet as you for reckless endangerment, you never forget her stats," he smiled warmly at Suze. Then turning towards Karies, his lips curled in a sarcastic grin. "Gehirn Karies, every time I see you, there is some puny fellah cowering behind you."
"It's just reflex, until they determine you're not related to me. Besides, this one's not mine."
"Oh, you have ID, fellah?" Stonetree asked The Inca.
"Uhm ... I meant he's with Knight."
"Don't go there, I'm not trying to figure Knight out anymore, he's no longer my responsibility."
"Well, uhm ... what do you do for fun now then, eh?" Suze inquired, all serious like.
"I do these things." Stonetree spread his arms to the room.
"Conventions?"
"No, plagues. I find the source." Stonetree looked pleased with his new career.
"Cool!" all three party newcomers nodded.
"Why the line-up, Stonetree?" Karies questioned.
"We're looking for the six most contagious people, then we chart their travels over the past few days, comings, goings, graphs, you know, all that pin-pointing type stuff, with the little colored tacks. I get a real kick outta those little colored tacks."
"Uhmmm. Sure, whatever. Why all the grilling about their costumes?"
"Some of them may have been smuggled into the country with the other contraband. The source could be anything, a person, an object, clothing. Right now we're focusing our hunt for a few items taken from private citizens, and some things from our police lock-up."
Karies tried to look innocent. [Yeah, right, like you could.] {CAN,
totally} [Don't yell, Karies. Can not!] {Suze, do you mind?} [Oh,
I'm sorry, just let us know who's talking without stretching the
probability.} [Suze, we're just outside of San Francisco chasing
around after a black swan with every fictional character we know,
dead or alive, and you're in a huff over my trying to look innocent?}
[It's just so ... unlikely.] {I did it with that highway patrolman,
didn't I?} [ "Like, fer instance?" Karies quizzed. [Thanks] {*Do you mind?*}
[Sorry] { Stonetree thought for a second, then answered. "Of course, there's
still this mysterious Black Swan, and oh, let's see, a bomb, some
virtual reality gear, a knife, and from the citizens, a vintage cape,
an antique goblet and a pair of size 9 1/2 E black boots."
"Oh, I have seen the black Buddha in your hotel room, Karies,"
The Inca spoke up.
Karies elbowed him in the stomach. "Quit fooling around. Heh." She
looked at Stonetree. "These friends of Knight, always so weird, eh?"
Stonetree looked suspicious, but shrugged it off.
"How, uhm, how soon before everybody's tested?" Suze asked,
trying desperately to look calm.
"Soon. Mingle, enjoy. But don't leave without being tested."
Stonetree wandered back into the fray.
The three stunned people flopped down at a table. Their friends
began coming over and sitting down, once they had been looked
over. When they were pretty much all there, Karies introduced
The Inca. "Gals, this is Inca. And one of us is most likely the
contagion."
"What?" They all gasped, looking at each other with searing eyes.
"It's true," Suze began. "The stuff they're looking for sounds a lot
like stuff we have."
"Like, what?" Texas Jules asked, wringing her boa.
"Like, a woman's vintage cape."
"I have a woman's vintage cape," Kristine spoke.
"And a Bomb, like mine, and an antique goblet."
"I - I have an antique goblet," Texas Jules stammered.
"And a pair of black boots, like mine." Karies sighed.
"There has to be some kind of explanation," Gail tried to reason,
even though she was feeling poorly.
"What?" Angie barked. "Suddenly convenient plot devices and
cheesy rationalizations don't cut it with you?"
"You're just jealous over my new job in Texas," Gail jibed back.
"Oh, I think not," Angie growled.
"We'll see when I'm soon immortalized in print, won't we?" Gail
snipped.
"Hey, this is not productive," Kira said breathlessly. Obviously she
too was fighting off the fever. She jumped to her feet, pulling The
Inca up with her. "Let's do what we came here for, let's party!"
"Wait, Kira, before you disappear, if you see the Black Swan
again, call one of us," Suze called out after her friend.
"I don't even feel sick," Bobbie moaned.
"We're probably all invaded ... *infected* by the contagions, it's
only a matter of time. We have to find that darn Swan. And we're
not gonna get that done sitting here," April spoke up.
"Can we just leave?" Gail wondered.
"Once we've been tested, sure, they know where to find us."
The others had cleared out and taken The Inca with them when
Suze and Karies stepped off the elevator into the lobby and headed
for the door.
"What's the ruckus?" Karies asked, as she joined Stonetree and his
team.
"They won't let Schanke in, he doesn't know where his badge is."
Stonetree grinned. "Oh, there now, he got in with that `would
anybody but a cop wear a suit like this' line."
"You know, Donut, what is it with you?" Karies chided. "You
don't know where your badge is, you never have any money, always
with the 'gimmie a loony,' lend me the caddy---"
"Hey, hey, what did I say `Give me a loony' like once, and you're
obsessed with it," Schanke postured.
"I do not obsess." Karies tried her best LaCroix impersonation.
"Yes, you do, I think so, and so does your little Knightie friend.
Oh, excuse me, Dark Knightie."
"Why are you always so testy, Schanke?"
"Testy? Now I'm testy?"
"Well, does it say you're testy in the script?"
"This is Fan Fiction! There is no script!" Schanke pulled at his
hair and growled.
"See, you're testy," Karies snickered.
"Because you're writing me testy," Don said, trying to keep his
cool.
"Oh sure, blame me, Donut. Or now that you're a vampire maybe I
have to call you Night Cruller," Karies chuckled.
"Yeah, well, if you weren't writing this, I wouldn't call you anything
at all!" Don lost his cool.
"Listen, Donut
Karies spotted Nick. "There's Knight, let's see what he's got."
"I'd love to see what he's got." Suze smiled.
"Suze, and you, a Knightie," Karies joked.
"A Dark Knightie," Schanke corrected.
"Right ... Knight! Whatcha got?" Karies furrowed her brows.
"Earth to Knight!"
"Wha-- oh, hi, sorry, all these costumes, they're so ... authentic ...
I'm flashing back all over the place," Nick stammered.
Just then Karies set her eyes on a beautiful creature gliding into the
lobby. "I'm having a flash all my own. Oh baby, Oh baby, Oh
baby, Oh."
"Huh?" Knight asked, whirling. "LaCroix!"
"Nicholas ... Don ... Ladies," LaCroix drawled
"What are you doing here, LaCroix?" Knight whined.
"Oh, just ... loitering." LaCroix grinned.
"This isn't going to turn into a buffet, LaCroix, these people merely
have a common cold, complicated by exhaustion and ... stuff like
that."
"A pity, really," LaCroix snickered.
"You spread gloom like an unopposed politician, LaCroix," Nick
complained.
"And so, in your eyes I am the contagion?"
"No, not the contagion, LaCroix."
"What then?"
"You are ... annoying my friends."
"No ... uhm ... really, Knight, he's not annoying me."
"But, uhm ... we have to go."
"Very well, run off after your ... birds of a feather," LaCroix
teased.
{Oh, my Dark Goddess, Suze did you hear how he said that?}
[Uhm ... No ... did you?] {Oh ... uhm, of course not, heh, just ...
just seeing how your fever is.} [I don't have a fever anymore, I
have bronchitis.] {Yeah, whatever.} [Your mission, should you
choose to get on with it.] {k} [k] {Quit IMing me, Suze, there's
something happening.} [What?]
"It's Screed, trying to get in the complex with ... with a bomb!"
Karies giggled.
"Hey! That's my bomb!" The cops all turned towards Suze. "Uhm
... just kidding, go back to ... whatever you were doing."
Nick pushed Screed into a corner and brow beat him into quieting
down, promising him extra cash and dispatching the bomb to the squad.
Suze eyed Screed suspiciously.
"Wha? I told ya I could smell her on ya, lolly!"
"The Bomb? You were talking about the bomb?" Suze asked.
"She's a ringer for them others what we chased down back then, eh
Knightly?"
"Yeah, yeah sure." Knight sighed, rubbing his temples and handing
Screed a roll of cash.
"Better left in Toronto, that, eh mate?" Screed grinned.
Just then, all hell broke loose. Captain Cohen and Schanke ran
through the lobby hot on the heels of a man in a uniform. Natalie
was heard shouting over the squawks of a very unhappy female
Black Swan that Alora was carrying into the complex, and Janette
seemed to come from nowhere and was arguing over an antique
black goblet with Serena who seemed to almost seep into the
lobby. Knight waltzed up to the two women and grabbed the
goblet out of their hands before they even noticed him.
LaCroix who was outside perched high above it all, on a satellite
dish, swooped down to more closely watch the fun.
Natalie, Schanke, Captain Cohen, Knight, Janette, and Serena all
converged on Captain Stonetree and the cops all at once said.
"Here's your Black Swan." Captain Cohen shoved some papers
rather unceremoniously into Stonetree's hands.
Stonetree stoically looked at the bird, the goblet, the hand cuffed
man and the cops. He looked at the papers in his hand, shook his
head grievously, passed them to Knight.
"He had those on him," Captain Cohen said flatly, jerking the hand
cuffed man to his knees. "Another threat to the board of health,
signed Black Swan, as well as a rejection letter from the Toronto
Vampire Academy. This is one disgruntled Immortal Wannabe."
"He does match the description on the file composite, Amanda,"
Stonetree said, walking towards Suze. He led her over to the fray.
"I'm sorry to have to tell you this Suze, I know how much this
will upset you ... but the test indicates you ... are most likely our
source. You may have been first to come into contact with the
contagion." Suze nearly fainted. "Now, help me out with this
one. Which one of these damn Black Swans did you come into
contact with?" Stonetree smiled his smug, this is gonna be simple
smile.
"Huh?" Suze asked.
"This ... trooper is a small time terrorist goes by the name a' The
Black Swan," Stonetree said, glancing momentarily at the trooper.
"This goblet is an antique art glass piece, titled `The Black Swan of
The Lake,' and this ... well, this is a rather lonely widowed Black
Swan." Stonetree grinned sinister, looking from the swan to LaCroix,
who didn't seem to notice the birds affectionous ministrations to
his leg.
"Uhm ..." Suze smiled her most crowd pleasing smile, the terminator.
"I ate chocolates from the goblet, I pet the bird for ... like a long
time and I ... well, I got pulled over by the trooper on Route 5."
Stonetree nearly fainted himself now. Suze had managed to come
in contact with all three of the suspected contagions.
"The trooper had to have been hiding behind a mountain of steers
at a stockyard that was so nasty and disgusting, we nearly died of
eeeeeeeeew!" Suze said, scrunching up her face.
"Steers?" Nat asked.
"Cows?" Cohen croaked.
Nick started sweating and looked uneasy.
"It was vile guys, so vile we needed a thesaurus to find new words
for nasty, disgusting ... for eeeeew," Karies added.
"Really?" LaCroix asked. "I shouldn't think it would be so hard.
You need synonyms. Offensive nauseating, vile---"
"LaCroix," Nick interrupted, "we are trying to solve a case here."
"Oh, very sorry, Nicholas." LaCroix curled his lips impishly. "Do
carry on."
Schanke wrestled the trooper back onto his feet. The angry trooper
looked Suze and Knight over. "Yeah, I pulled her over, but that one
was driving, over there." he motioned towards Karies, who slithered
behind Stonetree. "And him," he motioned towards Knight with his
head. "I seen him poking around down there a few nights ago too."
Nat mouthed a silent, "Nick, really!" Janette and Serena snickered
loudly.
LaCroix looked at Nick with distaste. "Revolting, sickening,
repugnant."
"Can it, Pops!" Schanke hushed LaCroix. "Knight, you went out for a
late nighter without your ole buddy Don? What is it with you anyway?"
Nick looked like a little boy about to cry. Nearly every woman and a
few men in the lobby licked their lips, moaning softly. Nick
continued shifting uneasily.
A med tech who had been running some on the spot tests stood up
from the floor. "The goose is clean."
"Swan," corrected the crowd.
"Yeah, like I care, and the goblet too."
"That leaves you!" Stonetree said to the trooper. "Your collar,
Amanda."
"Put him away, Schanke." Cohen beamed.
Serena and Janette cringed as Natalie grabbed the goblet.
"Evidence," she stated, clutching it to her bosom. The three
vampires stared at her, and then narrowed their eyes at each other.
"That goblet is important to all of us, Natalie," Janette reasoned.
"It may hold the key to many of our ... minor ailments."
"I'll take that," LaCroix said, reaching to swipe the goblet from
Natalie in a flash and unknowingly shaking the swan off his leg.
He held the goblet gingerly and looked down at his leg.
"Hey! That's evidence-- Eeeew, LaCroix, your leg is covered with
... feathers." Natalie snortled.
"What in hell?" LaCroix's fine silk trousers were ruined by tiny
sharp feathers. He scowled.
"LaCroix! Why are you dressed like that?" Janette asked.
LaCroix looked around. Janette wore jeans and a smart cotton
sweater, Serena wore jeans with an oversized sweatshirt, Schanke,
Stonetree and his crew all seemed to sport navy chinos with
casual shirts, Amanda had on a rather severe business suit, and
Nicholas sported black linen. "I knew I should have worn jeans to
this circus!" There was nothing LaCroix hated more than being
over-dressed. He did have on a nice casual rayon shirt. He drew
his clenched fists up even with his ears, shaking mildly. "It's the
wrong trousers, Nicho-laaaasss!"
"Knight is tied up right now, LaCroix," Karies grinned. "And ... I
think I might have just picked up a pair of trousers that'd fit you.
Thirty six ... l-l-l-long. I'd love to ... loan them to you, if ..."
"If?" LaCroix raised a brow.
"IF you let The Inca have a sip of the old crimson bounty outta that
mug. C'mon, he's really in a bad way, and he might be good for
some Special Magic if his closed captioning worked better, eh?"
She nudged LaCroix in the ribs.
LaCroix looked down at his leg. The swan was back. He hissed
like a rattler in the midday sun, scaring the lonely creature away,
then looked at Karies. "Very well, lead the way." When they
had cleared the goose glen LaCroix spoke in a bothered tone. "I
must tell you, I'm not accustomed to ... people ... giving me
ultimatums."
"Like?" Karies asked, oblivious to anything but the lighting of a
smoke.
"Ifs, ands or buts."
"Maybes, perhaps--" Karies added.
"Conceivably, perchance, possibly," LaCroix continued.
"Say that word, LaCroix, like words are..." Karies screwed up her
face.
"Synonyms?"
"Yeah, I can't say that, cinnamons?" Karies stammered.
No, listen! Synonyms," LaCroix hissed.
"Cimnomins?" Karies shrugged.
"No, watch my lips, synonyms, syn-o-nyms, syn-o-nyms." LaCroix
spoke slowly, his lips curling around the word, over and over.
Karies stared, mesmerized. "Are you all right?"
"Uhmnnn ... wha?"
******************
Knight stayed and helped Suze fill out the witness reports and sign
the duplicates. When they stood to leave, Suze nearly fainted.
"You're not well," Nick cooed.
"I -- I just need a little TLC," Suze assured him. "And a Diet Coke.
Oh no, I still don't have a key to my room, and ... I can't remember
which room is mine."
"That's okay, Suze, it's almost sunrise. The others got a suite for
the day, we can stay there."
"The *others*? You mean vampires? You mean Schanke, Serena,
*Janette*?" Suze asked.
"Yeah, s'okay?" Nick looked puzzled.
"No ... Nick ... I know she means a lot to you ... but Janette scares
me." Suze looked relieved of her confession.
"*Janette*? Really? Well, not to bother, we'll get a new room,
eh?" Nick swept her into his arms and carried her to the hotel.
******************
The hand gripped Suze firmly and shook her. "Suze, Suze, wake up."
"Oh, Nick---"
"*Nick*?" Karies backed away from her sick friend. "Eeeeew, gal,
don't tell me you dream about the Nick guy?"
"Karies?" Suze sat up. "What are you doing here?"
"Uhm ... you're in my room, remember, you needed a nap."
"A nap?"
"Yeah, you feeling any better? Your friends want you at their party.
Man, Suze, it's a bummer to be sick when it's your birthday."
"Yeah ... sick ... birthday ... uhm ... can I use your shower?"
End.
Additional Disclaimer: Suze is not actually under suspicion for
being the contagion source at BtK. {k?} [k]
Gehirn Karies (MindDebris@aol.com)
Kathy Whelton (103045.2473@Compuserve.com)
Thanks to Leslie GS for formatting.
