From: dflync01@homer.louisville.edu (David F Lynch)
Subject: Re: another reason to shoot Dobbs
Date: 26 Jul 1997 19:46:17 GMT
DAYKARAK (daykarak@aol.com) wrote:
: Hey, I just thought of something: Lynch, you're of the Subgenius, right?
: Aren't they against all forms of niceness and cuteness and so on (or as,
: they were called in that pamphlet, "pinks")? Has there been any talk of
: wiping out Hanson AND VH-1 in one brilliant sweep?
Pinkness can appear cute, but there's always a secret ugliness to it.
We want to expose the secret smut and take all the lost change from the
giant sofa of the Conspiracy. Yes, I am an ordained Subgenius minister, and
it is our sworn goal sent by the flaming sword of JHVH-1 to destroy the
Conspiracy. However, we only own THREE nuclear weapons next to the
thousands of nuclear weapons owned by the Conspiracy- if we attempted to
take them out with force, it would be a complete blowout, and we wouldn't
even get any good press from it. No, the cult that goes nova too soon will
not persist. We are still in the process of raising support for our goals
in anticipation of the arrival of the X-ist saucers in 1998. However, I
personally believe that there has been some mix-up in the dates between
1998 and 1989, and our eschatology is hotly disputed right now. Sooner or
later one front will gain the dominant hand within the Cult and solidify
end-times dogma, but that won't be until the end-times themselves happen.
For instance, I personally believe that the seeds of MWOWM were planted,
obelisk-like, by the X-ists in '89, along with the fortitude needed to
preserve Earth from destruction of the Conspiracy before 1998. A "booster
shot", if you will. The Conspiracy has not yet mastered the "MWOWM Terminals"
(MWOWM, BTW, is the giant supercomputer that will be ironically enough a
key element to the destruction of the Pinks- "give any one species too much
rope" and all that.), but the Subgenii have been working on them- Slackware
Linux is of course an outgrowth of primitive MWOWM technology. Anyway,
despite all the specific predictions, nobody _really_ knows what will happen
on July 5, 1998. Whether the bodies of the card-carrying Subgenii will
be "ruptured" onto the X-ist flying saucers fo the sex goddesses (this is
the majority view, but IMO evidence strongly points to the theory that
the "rupture", as it is called, actually happened in 1989. I further believe
that the "rupture" was responsible for usurping the bodies of the LATENT
Subgenii as well. The 1989 date was needed to man the X-ist saucers- when
they return, we shall find that the "pilots" of the saucers winging their
way to us are actually CONTROLLED from "Planet X"- so called not only because
that is what the Pink media will dub it, but because its true identity has
been hidden from "Bob" and thus ourselves (we know many things that "Bob"
doesn't, but in the realm of spiritual truth "Bob" knows everything, even if
he doesn't UNDERSTAND it as we would understand- he's a Savant Messiah,
capable of acting on information that carries no meaning whatsoever to him.)-
by OUR RUPTURED OVERMAN/UBERWOMAN BODIES, and all intra-saucer sex will
be only as per ONANISM- the formation of TYM (True Yeti Mate) saucer cells
will follow closely, if it hasn't already, I think- anyway, this will hold
with the prophecies of the Book of Trubee (cf. Book of Rift, "Murdering
Hell's Happy Cretins"). The reason we persist in meat-life is of course
to give us the chance for revenge upon the Conspiracy, to become personally
involved in a way the Ascended Yeti forms of ourselves were not. The
importance of the membership card, then, becomes that of an umbilical link
to those Outer Yeti, a means for receiving instructions from beyond-
it should be kept on one's person at all times, or eaten- the Nental elements
present in the card will not pass through one's bowels. I THINK. The
importance of 1998? Still a mystery- but despite the paramount but destined
to be ignored importance of '89 (could we REALLY have surived Reagan/Bush
without DIVINE INTERVENTION? When did Bush become, instead of a monstrous
CIA covert operative, an ineffectual twit who couldn't even get REELECTED?
1989. July 5. Cf. also July 6, 1189, being declared "Time Immemorial".),
I feel that July 5, 1998 DOES have a separate, pivotal, role, which is how
it made it into the books. I posit that Stang or somebody interpreted
the variance between '89 and '98 as more evidence of Dobbs' mental
derangement. (Dobbs himself, incidentally, while ironically becoming most
famous personally for the Church, had his hand in many pies, and had very
little to do with the Church itself. He was in reality a very savvy trend
manufacturer and marketer, responsible for the Hula Hoop, Slinky, Microwave
Oven, and millions of other peripheral household items. His inspiration in
business was Shadrock Bailey, inventor of the safety match. Not all of his
ideas sold, though. Dobbs seized upon the Church and copyrighted it and
all in a marketing frenzy in the '50s under the influence of L. Ron Hubbard,
but quickly tossed it away as "unsaleable", and the idea lay dormant until
the 1970s, when he was able to license it to a struggling experimental
filmmaker known to the world as "Ivan Stang" nowadays. Against everyone's
expectations, including "Stang"'s, the Church became a moderate success-
Stang attributed his luck to Dobbs (whence it might possibly be due, but
not in the degree given), and he became an object of veneration. Dobbs
was ambivalent about this, just as the Church was ambivalent about him,
and after his death from stroke in 1982, Stang even went on to invent a
FICTIONAL "Dobbs". If he's LUCKY Dobbs isn't REALLY a "god", or
"immortal". The Church itself was not invented by Dobbs, of course, but
has been around since the dawn of the Yeti; the commercialistic aspects
of course were not practiced actively in Mutantis.) Anyway, in light of
these facts, the events to occur at 7 AM on July 5, 1998 become once more
mysterious.) So, I might have skimped on Conspiracy-fighting strategies
here, but the basics are very simple anyway- the spread of bulldada and
morealism. Make the truth more attractive than lies. Dig?
--
Dave (Not David) Lynch/Eligible Mutant Bachelor Uebergeek at Large
SEE the FUTURE at http://www.prysm.net/~cuthulu/dave_lynch/new.htm
Brrr-woowoowooowooowoowoo-brrrRRRRRrrrrr (Galaxians 7/83)