Subject: Re: Pastor Craig picks up his kendo stick

Date: 15 Feb 1997 00:00:00 GMT

From: (MegaLiz)

Organization: MotPU: Where Binary Moodswings are ALWAYS on the Menu

Newsgroups: alt.slack

References: 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 , 6 (Michael Townsend) wrote:


: I'm not feeling guilty - in fact I take

: great pleasure in the ways I've been able to mix "Bob" and "job". Why just

: yesterday I received the opportunity to write the headline: ARE YOU READY

: FOR 1998?


And yesterday, paying homage to my soon-to-be-unemployed future in my

small way, making his good eye bulge with FURY, I gave my favorite

reply to the annoying boss question. Only this time I MEANT IT...


Jabba the Boss: Whatcha doin?

MegaLiz: Just goofin off. WHY?

I don't think I saw anybody say that working in a Con job is

necessarily some sort of EVIL SELLOUT. The job can be entertaining if

not fulfilling. Mine has little to offer, but it does have its bizarre



There's some sort of outside chance that all my labors in the last

decade have contributed to preventing some schmuck from having to have

his head reattached, but who am I to say that said schmuck DESERVED

it? I acknowledge my corner of the Con and find it amusing on bad days

and HILARIOUS on good days.


I could feel deep and lingering remorse about the quantity of paper

words I have distributed, which had they been absorbed, would have

caused the reader a really bad headache and possibly would have

chiseled at his meager will to live. But I am reassured that few of

the intended readers ever blinked at, much less READ or OBEYED any of

that stuff. It DID NO HARM. I'm pretty sure. I am a bad person who

chuckles at dead trees and uses a paper shredder DAILY.


So this is the boost that I got from "Bob": instead of CARING about

STUPID SHIT and gerbiling around for MORE STUPID SHIT to do when the

"essential" STUPID SHIT was outta the way, I quit. I quit my job just

a little. I did what was expected, then what I wanted, and that's all.

I do not cringe as I approach the bank. Nono.


What happened when I quit? Nobody noticed. Nothing changed. Except me.

Instead of hosting an illusory pink pride in my work, 99% of which is

STUPID SHIT, I had the recognition of its enormous Slack potential. I

mined the 1% so as not to mind the other 99. It still SUCKS, but it

sucks very little Slack.


These days it even BLOWS SLACK, because I'm now sitting around the job

like a TIMEBOMB that everyone tries to pretend is just another normal

female. I am overripe for an explosive departure, and I have been ever

since the brave Rev threw himself on the Luck Plane, spinning out to

Genuine Employment Enjoyment. He can admire my job fortitude, but

fortitude before this sort of STUPID SHIT is just STUPIDER SHIT.


I'm enjoying most everything about the job now, watching the nastier

bits wind down is the LEAST uplifting aspect. I'll blast out soonly

now, with ever increasing certainty that the next "job" can be no

worse. Whatever it is, I will have quit a bit before I ever get





* Asterisk of sounding serious, I may prefer to remain mysterious.

Fat-free Feet: Not just a tasty breakfast treat.

Want to read about the S.P.E.R.M.? Leave a message with my firm.

If most of this is clear to you, know then what you must not do.