Subject: Yeah, but WHY?
Date: 09 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT
From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Mumthra)
Organization: MotPU: Where Binary Moodswings are ALWAYS on the Menu
Newsgroups: alt.foot.fat-free, alt.slack
I went to pick up another supply of nicotine patches, not that I
really NEED them, but they leave the most FETCHING red patches of
dermitosis you ever did see. I'm HOOKED on these things.
I'm going to be a meat checkerboard before I'm through my abbreviated
program. I've started lopping the corners off of them in the last few
days, in order to reduce the dose gradually and make more cool
patterns with the little triangles.
When I got to the pharmacy counter, I was confronted with two brands
in various strengths, and it seemed pretty clear that my best bargain
was another starter kit of 21 mg sticky hurts. Then I noticed a sale
tag on the 15 mg starter kit. Hmmm. Dropping down to 15 mgs right now
would probably throw me off of my system. I'd have to quit cutting
corners for a few days at least.
I compared the smaller print on each and hailed the pharmacist for
pharmassistance. "Excuse me," I said, for no particular reason, "This
package says 15 milligrams a day and this one says 21 milligrams a
day, but they appear to be the same dose."
"No," she said, "they aren't. Twenty-one milligrams is stronger."
"I understand that, but this says it delivers 15 milligrams over 16
"--and this one says it's 21 milligrams in 24 hours, so if I left the
15 mg patch on for 24 hours wouldn't I get about another 6 mg?"
"It doesn't work that way."
I started to ask WHY, but I had ceased to exist while she started
"helping" another customer.
I wondered: am I supposed to believe that these things are ten dollars
cheaper because they have sophisticated TIMERS in them that shut off
after 16 hours, or that they are part of the perpetual going-stale
I will never buy drugs from this woman, in any case. Well, not AGAIN,
Emancipate a comma! Evict mental ergonomics!