Subject: Yeah, but WHY?

Date: 09 Nov 1998 00:00:00 GMT

From: nospamum@radix.net (Mumthra)

Organization: MotPU: Where Binary Moodswings are ALWAYS on the Menu

Newsgroups: alt.foot.fat-free, alt.slack

 

 

 

 

I went to pick up another supply of nicotine patches, not that I

really NEED them, but they leave the most FETCHING red patches of

dermitosis you ever did see. I'm HOOKED on these things.

 

I'm going to be a meat checkerboard before I'm through my abbreviated

program. I've started lopping the corners off of them in the last few

days, in order to reduce the dose gradually and make more cool

patterns with the little triangles.

 

When I got to the pharmacy counter, I was confronted with two brands

in various strengths, and it seemed pretty clear that my best bargain

was another starter kit of 21 mg sticky hurts. Then I noticed a sale

tag on the 15 mg starter kit. Hmmm. Dropping down to 15 mgs right now

would probably throw me off of my system. I'd have to quit cutting

corners for a few days at least.

 

I compared the smaller print on each and hailed the pharmacist for

pharmassistance. "Excuse me," I said, for no particular reason, "This

package says 15 milligrams a day and this one says 21 milligrams a

day, but they appear to be the same dose."

 

"No," she said, "they aren't. Twenty-one milligrams is stronger."

 

"I understand that, but this says it delivers 15 milligrams over 16

hours--"

 

"Right."

 

"--and this one says it's 21 milligrams in 24 hours, so if I left the

15 mg patch on for 24 hours wouldn't I get about another 6 mg?"

 

"No."

 

"Really?"

 

"It doesn't work that way."

 

I started to ask WHY, but I had ceased to exist while she started

"helping" another customer.

 

I wondered: am I supposed to believe that these things are ten dollars

cheaper because they have sophisticated TIMERS in them that shut off

after 16 hours, or that they are part of the perpetual going-stale

sale?

 

I will never buy drugs from this woman, in any case. Well, not AGAIN,

anyway.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------

Emancipate a comma! Evict mental ergonomics!