Subject: Sparky: Queen of the First-grade Fringe
Date: 02 Sep 1997 00:00:00 GMT
From: email@example.com (MegaLiz)
Organization: MotPU: Where Binary Moodswings are ALWAYS on the Menu
I've already detailed the hazards of following Sparky into new situations,
so you might expect that this morning's mission was particularly dangerous.
You'd might expect to be WRONG then. She didn't even register on the
voltage meter before school, even though it's the first day in an alien
I was pretty well charged, however. We had been to the orientation thingy,
where Sparky refused to stake out her desk in the all-girl section;
instead, she put her mark on a mystery grouping of desks, where all the
kids who were missing orientation would presumably materialize later. This
has made things extry interesting.
With the disclaimer that I am NOT a reflexive snob, I have to dutifully
report that most of the other mothers were just AWFUL. They would rather
talk ABOUT the kids than talk TO them, a practice that I avoid
purposefully. In the space of a few moments, I was informed that we had the
class with "the best girls" and that we had one of the "troubled boys."
Guess where little Troubled Gus was sitting. Right. Next to Sparky. (The
really peculiar thing is the OTHER kid. The already appointed Captain of
the Class has a remarkably similar name to our girl. Let's call her
SparkLee. Her last name is, in actual fact, Dobbs).
I have to admit to a moment of Pink Terror when Gus's status was explained
to me. "What exactly did he do?" I inquired. It seems that last year, Gus
liked to talk to himself, sometimes argue with himself, and occasionally
ended up hitting himself. FEH. He's only SIX. I plan on giving Gus an extra
cookie whenever I can. (I don't know why I expected a valid reason for him
to be the designated WEIRDO - in my first grade our weirdo wasn't even
weird, he was just a Jew).
One has to wonder why the FIRST DAY has to reek of DESTINY. Well, *I* had
to wonder. I was soaking in it for hours. By the time I left there, I had
accomplished some real work, had unobtrusively defended little Gus (who was
behaving JUST FINE), saw Sparky launched without tears or spontaneous
combustion, and had a chance to observe the viral effect of SparkLee, which
is, so far, benign. Now SHE makes me nervous.
"Don't expect any more free squirrel brains from me, neither."