From Sat Dec 13 08:39:04 1997

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Hate for Victory

From: "Dr. Ginsu" <>

Date: Sat, 13 Dec 1997 16:39:04 GMT



Being that, at this stage in the life-cycle of the Church one is

either on the bus or off the bus, and since the only thing we as

Ministers MUST do is to stay alive between here and X-Day, I'm going to

take the opportunity to explain to alt.slack the precise emotions I have

for our esteemed leader, the One whose ego we have spent so much time,

money and emotion bolstering.


I'm talking about that damned Reverend Ivan Stang.


He doesn't like me particularly, and I don't particularly look very

fondly at him. Sure, he's spent alot of time spewing lies for his own

personal gain. Sure, he's been involved in distasteful business

tactics. Sure, he's talked about how much of a loose liberal feel-good

hippie he is while condemning some so-called "evil empire," a Conspiracy

of Normals and Pinks who participate in practices which he finds

offensive, even though some of these practices include making business

promises that they actually wind up keeping, like subscriptions to

magazines that don't exist. I suppose those are the kind of Pinks Stang

rails against, the kind who take money at the false promise of something

tangible in return, like magazine subscriptions, right Stang? Those are

the kinds of Pinks who this whole magazine-peddling Church promises to

destroy, right? No wonder you can't make a buck.


Not only that, but the only actual and true exchange of product for

dough that comes directly out of this Church comes from the Sacred Sales

table, which is set up in remote corners of remote bars in the remotest

sections of remote towns. To find out about where these tables will be

set up, you must pay to be on some kind of secret in-joke mailing list

(which doesn't actually exist) to get the secret location, where, if

you're lucky and over 21, the grand wizards of the Church will let you

buy t-shirts from them, and subscriptions to magazines that don't exist,

to lure you into spending more money (just like Scientology!) to get on

this non-existent secret list. Then you'll be asked to participate, but

only insofar as you can participate by shutting up and opening your

wallet. Oh, and don't be suprised if the people who you see as making

the rules get confused as to which rules they've already made, and which

ones they have yet to establish. They don't know shit from shinola



Pissed off and rotten,