From pnarco@worldnetREMOVE2REPLY.att.net Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: The Brag of the Really Lame Subgenius

Date: Wed, 10 Jun 1998 01:17:31 GMT

 

yay! I am a really good person and uh... let's see, I'm cool as a...

refrigerator! and I am able to do many neat things such as.. uhm,

well, I have good communication skills and I, well I'm good with pets

and children, well I don't like children that much but one time there

was this kid at the video store and his dad went into the porn section

and left him alone and before he got scared I showed him some disney

pogs to get his mind off it but anyway.. so I'm like really

RESOURCEFUL and I well I have lots of good qualities I could tell you,

I uh, I am well, hmmm...

 

I guess you could say I'm a people person. I'm very creative and I

come from a good background and let's see, I'm a pretty good cook. Did

you ever make spaghetti with Manwich sauce? It's really hard to find

at the supermarket. At Safeway they don't just tell you what aisle

it's on, they go and show you where it is, but I feel guilty cuz they

must get asked stuff like 'where's the Manwich sauce all the time'. I

mean is it canned meat or what? but I digress...

 

I am just really REALLY great! I mean, uh... I am... well, I'm really

reliable, you wouldn't believe. I always show up to work ontime unless

there's like a traffic jam or something and I, well, you know, I like

myself, I guess that's what I'm saying. I've learned to like myself

and I feel that I'm just a really good person. I don't have to come up

with all these metaphors and everything to show how great I am. I

don't need your validation. Why are you judging me? What did I ever

do to you?

 

GET OFF MY BACK YOU FUCKER!!!!!!

 

I'm sorry. Oh. I'm sorry I flew off the handle like that. i guess

things haven't been going well lately. sometimes I lose my temper, but

I'm really an easy going person usually. That's another thing you

should know about me. I'm friendly. I just, I don't know, like one

time a friend of mine came over and he was just acting really

obnoxious and he kept playing with my stereo and I said 'don't play

with my stereo' and he just kept on playing with it and he would stop

I told him to stop and they he started making snide comments and I

just snapped and tore his shirt and .. well.. I think it's like a

sugar imbalance or something? I read in a Time magazine article it has

something to do with serotonin levels

 

I don't know...

 

But anyway,

 

Let's see, this is a brag? I don't know... I'm supposed to like list

good things about myself? Like affirmations right? "I am getting

better and better every day in every way" Sometimes I say that in

front of the mirror and it makes me feel good. I'm, let's see, I'm

uh...

 

I'm going to go take a nap, maybe I can work on this brag thing later

when I'm feeling less tired.