Re: It's STILL snowing

Author:Dr. Ginsu

Email:jNOcSPAMh1@voicenet.no.spam.com

Date: 1997/12/11

Forums:alt.slack

 

Nully Fydyan wrote:

> Just so you know.

>

> By now you're probably exasperated with these little weather reports,

> and

> on the verge of asking, "Nully, are these going to continue until

> March?"

>

> Unfortunately, the only answer I can give is, "No. Until April."

>

> So deal. "Bob" knows, I am.

>

> Nully

>

> --

> Rev. Nully Fydyan

> Church of the Ungendered Yeti

>

> "NO! NO! THAT YO-YO IS A NO-NO FOR BOBO!" -- MegaLiz

 

 

 

Are you KRAZY?!?! "Bob" deals in I AM! And knows it. Why does he

do it? Because he has no choice, that's why. He has even less choice

than you, Nully. He IS the weather report you just gave! He is...he is

the weather itself, when he concentrates hard enough. You know "Bob",

His Ways, His 'Deal' 'with' 'Ivan', and the difference is that it makes

you famous while it makes Ivan poor. But you don't care, either, and

neither do I. All I care about is when "Bob" comes again. I want him

to come again, and again and again. The First Coming of "Bob" was

apocalyptically understated. The Second Coming is going to be the

granddaddy of all Second Comings. It's blowing in your wind, Nully,

it's in the SNOW that's falling RIGHT NOW! All you care about is all I

care about, and all that is is coming quicker than a greased proton in

that Accelerator all those scientists are sapping your tax dollars for.

The Second Coming is right around the bend, don't wait up, get out your

sleds and boogie! Hot chocalates all around, and it's all in the wind,

the air we breathe and even the economy which drove the internet right

up to "Bob"'s drive-through window. The Second Coming, the gelatinous

computer you're sitting at, spewing green slime like it were the Second

Coming, S.P.U.T.U.M. leaping out at you from your computer terminal, the

Big Squirt, the Second Coming, and all you figured on was some stupid

little ol' "Bob" thingy waggin it's tail at you like some kind of hog in

heat! The Second Coming, the alien bankers will decend from space and

create living Aztec rock out of the plastic computer peripherals sitting

at our desks, and as your trembling hands move towards the button to

click 'Send,' you'll remember that you were here, before, Nully, and it

was snowing then, too, except that every snowflake was exactly alike,

and every snowflake had the shape of...

 

Keep It Up,

Ginsu