Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: a troll

From: "kevbob" <>

Date: 5 Mar 1998 04:55:57 GMT


johnny was walking down the path. the cobble stones were worn with wear.


the birds were chirping, chirpily. the sun was shining, in a pleasent way.

the breeze was warm and slight, the leaves whistled a pleasent tune under

it's orchastration. and yet, johnny was looking for something. something

he couldn't find,


and therefor wouldn't find.


such is the way of johnny.


susan was walking down a path, very similar. susan, too, was searching for

something, something she didn't know she was looking for.


and therefor wouldn;t find.


such is the way of susan.


sir derrick the brave was looking for a grail on a nearly identical path,

and he never found it, yet he was a hero.


such is the way of sir derrick the brave.


catherine was riding her 4-wheeler down a path, WITHOUT A HELMET, and was

looking for her ex-boyfriend, thinking that running him over would bring



she never found peace.


such is the way of catherine.


thomas the accountant was looking for something amongst his loopholes and



you get the idea.



funny, how, everyone is doing it differently, yet they all end up with

squat in the end.


in the end, we are all the same.


but some go through life blindly with a smile on their face,


while the others go through life blinded by a hatered for those stupid

happy-happy useless generic prozac-in-the water supply becasue it has to be

physically impossible to be tha damned happy all the time naturally "ohboy

it's sunny let's go out and play!" "oh biy it's raining, let's go out and

play in the puddles" "oh boy, nuclear winter, let's go into the shelter's

and play charades" the sky id falling but we'll make the best of it oh wow

i never knew that hanson's lyrics had such deep meaning type of people.


because, in the end, we all end up the same, exept:


some people have more ulcers and more wrinkles than others.


which is why,


oil of olay,


and rolaids,


are the only things in the universe which can make everyone equal.


so, the next time you default on a loan,

reach for your revolver,

reach for that bottle,

reach for your remote control,

reach for your pleasure spaceship,

reach for your red camarro,

reach for your pentium II,

reach for your hour of slack tape,

your prozac, your amphatamines, your crack, your guitar, your girlfriend,

your credit card companies calling you at 4 in morning, your ex-long

distance company sends you a valentine, your mother tells you you were

amistake, your shoe lace breaks, your guidance counselor laces your coke

with angeldust, your boss fires you, your house burns down, your air

conditioner dies, your car breaks down, your dog dies




all were not created equal,




m&m's are the milleniam's OFFICIAL candy.




Mammy : They fairly dull the pain of my existence.



From Thu Mar 05 19:14:10 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: a troll

From: (MegaLiz)

Date: Fri, 06 Mar 1998 03:14:10 GMT


"kevbob" <> wrote:


: johnny was walking down the path. the cobble stones were worn with wear.


[...and so on]


Is it alright if I just sit here and sigh for a minute? I'd really

LIKE to compose something clever, but at this moment, my Slack is just

to PRAISE you, wordlessly, kevbob. The trouble with THAT is that if I

just sit here and praise you wordlessly, you won't know about it until

you are reincarnated as a spider under my PC, and if you WERE going to

be reincarnated in a retroactive fashion suitable to having awareness

of my silent praise, well then I imagine that the odds would be about

EVEN that you'd be paying attention at this precise moment which may

or MAY NOT come again. So, it really would be simpler and more sure

all around if I just said something about it now.


That goes for the rest of yous, mostly. Lately, I just wanna say,

" know...THING."



"I would say DUH! when you say that, except that you told me

that's rude. So can I just whisper "duh" instead? Really quietly?

Would that be okay?" -Sparky

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