Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst)

Date: Fri, 20 Feb 1998 06:22:58 -0600

 

I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off to

think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me too happy

anymore. I remember as a young child I used to love Christmas. In my family

it was a pretty big deal and there were always tons of presents and good

food and the relatives coming to visit, and it was so warm and cozy

practically anyone would have loved it. And now it's been years since I've

even celebrated it; in fact I sort of hate it and most other holidays too.

The fourth of July in particular irks me; the fireworks that were such

forbidden treasure when I was a kid scare my pets and annoy the piss outta

me now. Valentines day has always reeked of scam to me-I had a girlfriend

one time who came pretty close to killing me 'cos I didn't make a big deal

out of it. It's been years even since I celebrated my birthday.

These days I find I'm most happy, if that is the word for it, if a day

goes by and NOTHING happens. Is that what life has become? It's not even

happiness, it's just a vague sense of relief that some disaster didn't

occur. By the world's standards I know I have it pretty good, at least

materially. Like most Americans I haven't worried about having enough food

or clothes or shelter for years. It's pretty unlikely that a bomb is gonna

go off in my neighborhood. There's a girl in my complex whose boyfriend's

car stereo got ripped off over Christmas, and that's about it for crime and

intrigue in my neighborhood. Not exactly Beirut.

Sometimes I feel like my life is a sort of dull movie that I just

watch disinterestedly, hoping something happens. But for all that, I know

rationally that I shouldn't complain, and if you don't count this I usually

don't (really!). I know other people that feel that way too-not really

unhappy but just kind of listless. Maybe it's that life has made us, or me

at least, expect so much that we can't help but be disappointed. Or maybe

the best one can hope for is anxious contentment.

I guess you guys have it made with the saucers and all, but even

though I like all of you very much I'm just not a joining type of person,

assuming that you would want me to join, which I don't assume at all. So

come July 5th, I'll still be here and without even the alt.slack folk to

laugh at/with/etc. (I like sci.skeptic, but after five years or so it's

getting old). So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

with time.

 

axel heyst

 

 

From virtualole@aol.com Fri Feb 20 06:54:45 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle)

Date: 20 Feb 1998 14:54:45 GMT

 

>So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>am genuinely curious.

 

I used to have the same problem you did -- then I started doing a simple thing:

I started sending 10% of my earnings to "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

 

Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check to "Bob"

and I'm a happy camper for the rest of the weekend. Even if they could

automatically transfer the money out of my account, I wouldn't do it -- I just

LOVE writing "I love you, 'Bob'" on the memo line. I know he loves me, too.

 

Praise "Bob"

 

 

-------------------------------

Honest-to-"Bob" paid-in-full member of the Church of the SubGenius

Acting Prime Minister for Life of the Superiorland Government-in-Exile

Discordian Pope

Keeper of OLE/WORLD! http://member.aol.com/VirtualOle/world.html

 

 

From axel@SPAMXverinet.com Fri Feb 20 13:41:51 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst)

Date: Fri, 20 Feb 1998 15:41:51 -0600

 

In article <19980220145401.JAA06641@ladder03.news.aol.com>,

virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle) wrote:

 

>>So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>>am genuinely curious.

>

>I used to have the same problem you did -- then I started doing a simple thing:

>I started sending 10% of my earnings to "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

>Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

>

>Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check to "Bob"

>and I'm a happy camper for the rest of the weekend. Even if they could

>automatically transfer the money out of my account, I wouldn't do it -- I just

>LOVE writing "I love you, 'Bob'" on the memo line. I know he loves me, too.

>

>Praise "Bob"

>

>

>-------------------------------

>Honest-to-"Bob" paid-in-full member of the Church of the SubGenius

>Acting Prime Minister for Life of the Superiorland Government-in-Exile

>Discordian Pope

>Keeper of OLE/WORLD! http://member.aol.com/VirtualOle/world.html

>

 

I figured that would play a role-just a hunch on my part. I don't work so

technically I wouldn't be able to avail myself of this particular route to

bliss.

 

axel heyst

 

 

 

From jch1@voicenet.nospamm.com Sat Feb 21 05:06:29 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "Ginsu" <jch1@voicenet.nospamm.com>

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 13:06:29 GMT

 

 

 

axel heyst <axel@SPAMXverinet.com> wrote in article

<B11354BF9668587F@willow27.verinet.com>...

> In article <19980220145401.JAA06641@ladder03.news.aol.com>,

> virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle) wrote:

> "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

> >Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

> >

> >Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check to

"Bob"

> >and I'm a happy camper for the rest of the weekend.

 

If only "Bob" could cleanse his church of filthy liars like yourself,

assuming the mantle of the SubGenius would MEAN something around here.

 

SubGeniuses: Liars every one of them to a man. Praise "Bob"!

 

 

 

From kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net Sat Feb 21 08:20:31 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "kevbob" <kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net>

Date: 21 Feb 1998 16:20:31 GMT

 

Ginsu <jch1@voicenet.nospamm.com> wrote in article

<01bd3ec8$c97f8200$b60f67cf@f9e1t0>...

> axel heyst <axel@SPAMXverinet.com> wrote in article

> <B11354BF9668587F@willow27.verinet.com>...

> > In article <19980220145401.JAA06641@ladder03.news.aol.com>,

> > virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle) wrote:

> > "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

> > >Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

> > >Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check

to

> "Bob"

> > >and I'm a happy camper for the rest of the weekend.

> If only "Bob" could cleanse his church of filthy liars like yourself,

> assuming the mantle of the SubGenius would MEAN something around here.

>

> SubGeniuses: Liars every one of them to a man. Praise "Bob"!

 

i hate hypocrites.

 

if only there were more love.

 

but, alas, there is not. and as such, we, us, and you, and me, and them,

must carry on our wayward sons and daughters of the confedarecy dropping

like flies decades ago with a gas crisis imminent but noone talking about

it just doing to much to ensure the decadence of the coming decades would

continue on ensuring the survival of angst-based pop bands becoming

mainstream and jading, even more, an already jaded movie going populave

into hiding behind computer screen cathode ray induced man ray wannabe's

singing spice gril songs while vainly trying to create, create, create

something on black and white film that will only,

 

in the end,

 

be destroyed by the very nature if itself,

 

which is,

 

in the end,

 

to disintigrate into dust.

 

--

"Where IS my beautiful wife?"-rkb inc.

 

 

From twgs@whatsthepoint.net Sat Feb 21 10:52:58 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 18:52:58 GMT

 

Thus spake kevbob:

 

>i hate hypocrites.

 

That's a good start. You ought to broaden your sights, though. Don't

JUST hate hypocrites- hate damn near EVERYONE! You'll feel better for

it.

 

>if only there were more love.

 

Hah! People don't have the faintest idea what to do with the love

they HAVE and you want MORE of it? More love would be as bad as more

television- people have made such a complete botch of it, that any

more would only make things WORSE. When people start using the love

they have, then we can talk about getting more love.

 

>but, alas, there is not. and as such, we, us, and you, and me, and them,

>must carry on our wayward sons and daughters of the confedarecy dropping

>like flies decades ago with a gas crisis imminent but noone talking about

>it just doing to much to ensure the decadence of the coming decades would

>continue on ensuring the survival of angst-based pop bands becoming

>mainstream and jading, even more, an already jaded movie going populave

>into hiding behind computer screen cathode ray induced man ray wannabe's

>singing spice gril songs while vainly trying to create, create, create

>something on black and white film that will only,

 

Is that poetry? You lost me when you started talkin' poetry there.

 

--

I DISCRIMINATE AGAINST NORMALS twgs @thepoint.net KILL UGLY INTERNET

"Sister system, give me my leg back, will you? I've only been given

light-red fennels; hope you'll sob into a sunflower" - Lars Hollmer

 

From saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org Sat Feb 21 09:28:59 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: saint andreux <saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org>

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 09:28:59 -0800

 

Ginsu wrote:

>

> SubGeniuses: Liars every one of them to a man. Praise "Bob"!

 

Ooooohh... A paradox!

 

--

saint andreux -><- saint@prairienet*org www.prairienet.org/~saint

"that which disturbs your soul you must not suffer" - goethe

VISIONARY DRUNKARD - FREELANCE HIGH-TECH PROPHET FOR PROFITS

INQUIRE FOR QUOTE - EXPERIENCED DRINKING COMPANION - BUGGER OFF

 

From jch1@voicenet.nospamm.com Sun Feb 22 06:12:29 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "Ginsu" <jch1@voicenet.nospamm.com>

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 14:12:29 GMT

 

Here's one for ya, Andrew:

 

Imagine a library where there are two catalogues, one of which lists

precisely all the books in the library which somewhere refer to themselves

and the other, precisely all the books which make no mention of themselves.

In which catalogue is the second catalogue itself to be listed?

 

saint andreux <saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org> wrote in article

<34eeef7a.0@news1.starnetinc.com>...

> Ginsu wrote:

> >

> > SubGeniuses: Liars every one of them to a man. Praise "Bob"!

>

> Ooooohh... A paradox!

>

> --

> saint andreux -><- saint@prairienet*org www.prairienet.org/~saint

> "that which disturbs your soul you must not suffer" - goethe

> VISIONARY DRUNKARD - FREELANCE HIGH-TECH PROPHET FOR PROFITS

> INQUIRE FOR QUOTE - EXPERIENCED DRINKING COMPANION - BUGGER OFF

>

 

From saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org Sun Feb 22 11:31:37 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: saint andreux <saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org>

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 11:31:37 -0800

 

Ginsu wrote:

>

> Here's one for ya, Andrew:

>

> Imagine a library where there are two catalogues, one of which lists

> precisely all the books in the library which somewhere refer to themselves

> and the other, precisely all the books which make no mention of themselves.

> In which catalogue is the second catalogue itself to be listed?

 

Elementary, my dear Ginsu:

 

The one up your ass.

 

--

saint andreux -><- saint@prairienet*org www.prairienet.org/~saint

"that which disturbs your soul you must not suffer" - goethe

VISIONARY DRUNKARD - FREELANCE HIGH-TECH PROPHET FOR PROFITS

INQUIRE FOR QUOTE - EXPERIENCED DRINKING COMPANION - BUGGER OFF

 

From twgs@whatsthepoint.net Sat Feb 21 10:48:45 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 18:48:45 GMT

 

Thus spake Ginsu:

 

>If only "Bob" could cleanse his church of filthy liars like yourself,

>assuming the mantle of the SubGenius would MEAN something around here.

 

If it wasn't for filthy liars like myself, the mantle of the SubGenius

never would have meant anything in the first place!

 

--

I DISCRIMINATE AGAINST NORMALS twgs @thepoint.net KILL UGLY INTERNET

"Sister system, give me my leg back, will you? I've only been given

light-red fennels; hope you'll sob into a sunflower" - Lars Hollmer

 

From carey@humboldt1.com Sat Feb 21 08:27:42 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: carey@humboldt1.com (Rev. Matthew A. Carey)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 16:27:42 GMT

 

On 20 Feb 1998 14:54:45 GMT, virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle) wrote:

 

 

>I used to have the same problem you did -- then I started doing a simple thing:

>I started sending 10% of my earnings to "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

>Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

>

>Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check to "Bob"

 

 

Wow. You make a lot of money.

 

Ten percent of my paycheck wouldn't cover the stamp.

 

 

:::

noise obscure experimental

carey.matthew.a <http://www.humboldt1.com/~carey/>

orbital art colony weird text files

:::

 

From Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu Sat Feb 21 22:55:03 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)

Date: 22 Feb 1998 06:55:03 GMT

 

I just really like the fact that, on my newsreader at least, the list of topics

goes like this:

 

So what makes Subgenii happy?

Drugs are Cool

Women and Bubblebaths

 

Praise Dobbs!

 

StCBtD

 

 

From carey@humboldt1.com Sat Feb 21 15:30:34 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: carey@humboldt1.com (Rev. Matthew A. Carey)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 23:30:34 GMT

 

On 22 Feb 1998 06:55:03 GMT, Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)

wrote:

 

>I just really like the fact that, on my newsreader at least, the list of topics

>goes like this:

>

>So what makes Subgenii happy?

>Drugs are Cool

>Women and Bubblebaths

>

>

So what makes Subgenii happy?

Another sign of the end times.

As if you needed another reason.

 

 

 

 

 

:::

noise obscure experimental

carey.matthew.a <http://www.humboldt1.com/~carey/>

orbital art colony weird text files

:::

 

From mitchell@Doesn't.Spam.Suck.interserv.com Tue Feb 24 13:17:28 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: mitchell@Doesn't.Spam.Suck.interserv.com (Popess Lilith von Fraumench)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 21:17:28 GMT

 

In article <34ef637b.1273831@news.humboldt1.com>, carey@humboldt1.com wrote:

>On 22 Feb 1998 06:55:03 GMT, Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)

>wrote:

>

>>I just really like the fact that, on my newsreader at least, the list of

> topics

>>goes like this:

>>

>>So what makes Subgenii happy?

>>Drugs are Cool

>>Women and Bubblebaths

>>

>>

>So what makes Subgenii happy?

>Another sign of the end times.

>As if you needed another reason.

 

So what makes Subgenii happy?

A place to crash on X-Day eve?

Something for Something

 

 

P-Lil

 

--

| Popess Lilith von Fraumench | Fools' Press |

| Hangnail Of the Stark Fist | 1122 E Pike St, #769 |

| Sadomasticist At Large | Seattle, WA 98122-3934 |

|"Spiting the Gods since 1989"| mitchell@interserv.com |

| http://home.sprynet.com/interserv/mitchell |

 

From charliec@cybernex.net Sun Feb 22 16:01:37 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 00:01:37 GMT

 

Rev. Matthew A. Carey wrote:

>

> On 20 Feb 1998 14:54:45 GMT, virtualole@aol.com (VirtualOle) wrote:

>

> >I used to have the same problem you did -- then I started doing a simple thing:

> >I started sending 10% of my earnings to "Bob" at the Subgenius Foundation (P.O.

> >Box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

> >

> >Every other weekend, after I deposit my paycheck, I send my $80 check to "Bob"

>

> Wow. You make a lot of money.

>

> Ten percent of my paycheck wouldn't cover the stamp.

 

buy cheaper stamps.

 

From gerbil@ecst.csuchico.edu Fri Feb 20 19:10:01 1998

To: axel heyst <axel@verinet.com>

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Ross of the Fnords <gerbil@ecst.csuchico.edu>

Date: Fri, 20 Feb 1998 19:10:01 -0800

 

How sad! You have no slack. Slack for me is like gnosis and bliss

combined, along with everything going just right without thinking abou

tit. Slack is something for nothing. Visit www.subgenius.com to learn

about it.

 

The Church of the SubGenius is paradoxically one of the only

"orginizations" in the world that IS FOR NON-JOINERS! We don't want people

taht will all behave in similar ways, we want difference! We want

originality! We want crehativity! And we MUST HAVE SLACK.

More later. I may be able to help you, if your mind is truly open.

 

 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

* _ /|\ _ *

* [) ( ( Spiritual Prodigy |\ | /| /^\ 23! *

* |\ () _) _) Insane Artist \ | / / o \\ *

* <-----+-----> / \ \ *

* "I'm a drunken Indian man! / | \ / \_/ \ \ *

* Oh.... oh... oh... The letter, |/_ | _\| / \ / *

* 'O'... That means yes!" -Russ \|/ /___________\/ *

* *

* http://www.ecst.csuchico.edu/~gerbil (The Chaos Gerbil's Lair) *

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

 

 

 

From no@email.ads Sat Feb 21 03:28:34 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: no@email.ads (Christopher Giese)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 11:28:34 GMT

 

The evil genius known as axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

 

>I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off

>to think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me

>too happy anymore.

 

It's called depression. I am not a doctor, or even a keen observer

of behavior, but I get the impression that it's common among Subs.

 

[ snip behavior -- been there, done that ]

 

>I guess you guys have it made with the saucers and all, but even

>though I like all of you very much I'm just not a joining type of

>person, assuming that you would want me to join, which I don't

 

Why do you give a shit what others think of you? Send in yer $30.

I don't _know_ the Saucers will come, but it's cheap insurance. If

you don't at least get a laugh out of the Doktorate and Excuse and

Pamphlets, then use 'em for asswipe and come back here and bitch

at us.

 

>assume at all. So come July 5th, I'll still be here and without even

>the alt.slack folk to laugh at/with/etc. (I like sci.skeptic, but

>after five years or so it's getting old). So if it wasn't for the

>saucers, what would make you happy? I am genuinely curious. I mostly

 

ObSlack(s):

 

Zeppelin's "The Song Remains The Same", at full volume.

 

The view from high places.

 

Long walks (4 miles minimum). Bicycling.

 

Drinking heavily. After all these years, it still works. Sometimes.

For a while, anyway.

 

Sunlight.

 

Sleeping in the living room, where the waning moon shines on me

through the window.

 

(feel free to add on, fellow mutants...)

 

--

Every thirteen seconds, a woman has a baby. Our job is to find

this woman and stop her.

 

 

From twgs@whatsthepoint.net Sat Feb 21 11:01:29 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 19:01:29 GMT

 

Thus spake Christopher Giese:

 

>The evil genius known as axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

>

>>I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off

>>to think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me

>>too happy anymore.

>

>It's called depression. I am not a doctor, or even a keen observer

>of behavior, but I get the impression that it's common among Subs.

>

>[ snip behavior -- been there, done that ]

 

"Been there, done that". Indeed. But there are good reasons for OUR

KIND to be depressed. Depressed folks show LESS cognitive distortion

than your typical "optimists". Having been through the wringer a few

times, I now see it as a sign, a call to up and fuckin' DO something

about the shitty state the world is in. Now, that's not to say that

I'm down on medication- you might perhaps feel that there's nothing to

be done, or that in any case you have no energy to do it.

Antidepressants make a fine motivator in this case, while not dulling

the virulent cynicism that marks the SubGenius. Depression is a

result of the SubGenius' instinctive repulsion of False Slack, and is

best cured when Slack is located, with the interim treatments being

heaping helpings of scorn and mockery and the aforementioned

antidepressants.

 

--

I DISCRIMINATE AGAINST NORMALS twgs @thepoint.net KILL UGLY INTERNET

"Sister system, give me my leg back, will you? I've only been given

light-red fennels; hope you'll sob into a sunflower" - Lars Hollmer

 

From mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net Sat Feb 21 13:00:02 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net" <mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net>

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 21:00:02 +0000

 

In article <34ff229f.18067413@news.newsguy.com>, twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max

Sendq) wrote:

 

> Antidepressants make a fine motivator in this case, while not dulling

> the virulent cynicism that marks the SubGenius. Depression is a

> result of the SubGenius' instinctive repulsion of False Slack, and is

> best cured when Slack is located, with the interim treatments being

> heaping helpings of scorn and mockery and the aforementioned

> antidepressants.

 

Having been through more than a few bouts of severe depression myself, I

must chime in that antidepressants ARE THE CON'S SECOND MOST DANGEROUS MIND

CONTROL DEVICE (after TV.) You are absolutely right that the way to fight

depression is to find True Slack, but those goddamn happy pills are the

worst False Slack around. They dull everything that makes you unique; they

suppress ALL emotions, not just the "bad" ones; they kill your desire for

self-expression and make you think that the ultimate goal of life is to FIT

IN TO SOCIETY. The real secret to happiness is to FUCK SOCIETY - one at a

time or collectively, whatever does it for ya.

 

The Con tells us that the way to quiet our inner demons is to give in to

mediocrity. And the quickest, easiest way to forget about everything that

was ever really important to you is to lunch up on those

please-make-me-happy-it's-too-hard-being-different-I-want-to-be-just-like-ev

eryone-else, individuality-suffocating, blandness-inducing, fucking pills.

OF COURSE it's hard as hell to be different. THAT'S WHY OUR LIVES ARE WORTH

LIVING, AND THEIR LIVES AREN'T. Inner demons are a big fucking pain, and

most SubGenii struggle every day, every hour, some every second, to keep

those demons in their proper place. We're trying to live as individuals in

a world whose every detail is designed to make us give up our individuality.

The inner turmoil is THE ONLY WAY WE KNOW THAT WE HAVEN'T LOST YET.

 

So, by all means, take their goddamn pills. Let them re-program your

values. Relinquish everything about you that gives you strength. Whatever

you do, don't grow stronger from the fight. It's so much easier to just let

them have their way. . .and I'm sooo tired. . . . .

__________

Emmett the Immanent

 

The highest Slack is like water

Water gives life to the myriad of things, and does not strive

It flows in places men reject, and so is like Slack.

 

Tao Te Ching (updated)

 

From revjack@radix.net Mon Feb 23 23:29:48 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Sketchy Albedo <revjack@radix.net>

Date: 24 Feb 1998 07:29:48 GMT

 

Around here, the only treatment for depression is "CHEER THE FUCK UP".

 

CHEER THE FUCK UP comes in a handy four-step applicator package:

 

Step 1: Be tickled and kissed until you CHEER THE FUCK UP

 

Step 2: Merciless taunting

 

Step 3: Savage beating

 

Step 4: Death

 

 

No long faces in THIS house. CHEER THE FUCK UP has a 100% success rate and

has proven to be an effective dentrifice when used consistently. Ask your

doctor or pharmacist.

 

 

--

_________________

revjack@radix.net

We're Beatrice

 

From no@email.ads Sat Feb 21 15:12:06 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: no@email.ads (Christopher Giese)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 23:12:06 GMT

 

The evil genius known as twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq) wrote:

>Thus spake Christopher Giese:

>

>>The evil genius known as axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

>>

>>>I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off

>>>to think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me

>>>too happy anymore.

>>

>>It's called depression. I am not a doctor, or even a keen observer

>>of behavior, but I get the impression that it's common among Subs.

>>

>>[ snip behavior -- been there, done that ]

>

>"Been there, done that". Indeed. But there are good reasons for OUR

>KIND to be depressed. Depressed folks show LESS cognitive distortion

 

Depression is also the womb of creativity. For me, anyway. (And feel

free to extend this meatphor in tasteless yet Slackful ways. Something

about tampons, yes?)

 

>than your typical "optimists". Having been through the wringer a few

>times, I now see it as a sign, a call to up and fuckin' DO something

>about the shitty state the world is in.

 

Do something? Fantasize, that's about it. I don't picket or write the

elected coprolites in Washington or anything like that. I give blood,

recycle, contribute to the food pantry, etc. but when my Slack goes,

so does the charity.

 

>Now, that's not to say that I'm down on medication- you might perhaps

>feel that there's nothing to be done, or that in any case you have no

>energy to do it. Antidepressants make a fine motivator in this case,

>while not dulling the virulent cynicism that marks the SubGenius.

>Depression is a result of the SubGenius' instinctive repulsion of

>False Slack, and is best cured when Slack is located, with the interim

>treatments being heaping helpings of scorn and mockery and the

>aforementioned antidepressants.

 

Scorn and mockery, yeah. But no meds for me:

0. It ain't _that_ bad.

1. You need a prescription. From a doctor. A doctor who keeps records.

Records of 'mental problems' that will probably come back to haunt

you, despite blatherings of privacy.

2. Do they know yet how and why lithium works? Voodoo engineering

steals my Slack. Voodo medicine is unacceptable.

3. When my brain needs an emotional reboot, staying up all night does

the trick. (Your mileage may vary.)

 

Axel! Pull the wool over your own eyes! If Olympic hockey neanderthals

and self-Darwinating Fundies from Florida are making you sick then

turn the fucking TV off. I myself had to go on a little news holiday

after hearing Boris Yeltsin threatening World War III over Iraq.

 

Now. Back to posts about blow jobs, masturbating women, and bubble

baths.

 

ObSlack:

Drowning out obnoxious radio/TV commercials with abusive ad-libs:

RICH, CHOCOLATY OVULATING TEENS.

SUCK MY EIGHT POUND UPRIGHT...WITH ALTOIDS!

CALL OUR TWENTY-FOUR HOUR PHYSIC HOTLINE.

--

And another thing I've been wondering lately:

Am I crazy to believe in ideals?

-- Hoodoo Gurus

 

 

From !!!bmyers@ionet.net Sun Feb 22 06:14:49 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 14:14:49 GMT

 

no@email.ads (Christopher Giese) wrote:

 

>Scorn and mockery, yeah. But no meds for me:

>0. It ain't _that_ bad.

>1. You need a prescription. From a doctor. A doctor who keeps records.

> Records of 'mental problems' that will probably come back to haunt

> you, despite blatherings of privacy.

 

But that's the trick for the rest of us. You see, doctors are not any

smarter than the average SubGenius (except RobNotBob who's a doctor

AND a SubGenius) and they're ususally busy as hell, so it's quite a

simple matter to pull the wool over THEIR eyes. LET them believe that

I'm a little fucked up mentally. They'll never expect me to actually

be the mastermind behind all this. If everyone is depressed or prone

to anxiety attacks, then so am I. I can hide in plain sight that way.

They'll simply write me off as a nut case. I'm no danger to anyone but

myself...right?

 

yeah...right.

 

***

Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually

Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.

Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

 

 

From axel@SPAMX.verinet.com Sun Feb 22 09:44:51 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: axel@SPAMX.verinet.com (axel heyst)

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 11:44:51 -0600

 

In article <34ef5ef5.9086280@news.netwurx.net>, no@email.ads (Christopher

Giese) wrote:

 

> Snip a whole slew of posts of A MOST EXCELLENT NATURE

 

> Scorn and mockery, yeah. But no meds for me:

> 0. It ain't _that_ bad.

> 1. You need a prescription. From a doctor. A doctor who keeps records.

> Records of 'mental problems' that will probably come back to haunt

> you, despite blatherings of privacy.

> 2. Do they know yet how and why lithium works? Voodoo engineering

> steals my Slack. Voodo medicine is unacceptable.

> 3. When my brain needs an emotional reboot, staying up all night does

> the trick. (Your mileage may vary.)

 

I had a girlfriend who was on Prozac. The thing was, when she was on it,

she was very good-natured and funny and sexy and stuff, but when she

periodically went off it, mostly because one builds a tolerance, she was a

moody bitch. It was unbearable, the schizm between the two personalities,

and needless to say, it's another relationship that went swirling down the

toilet of life.

>

> Axel! Pull the wool over your own eyes! If Olympic hockey neanderthals

> and self-Darwinating Fundies from Florida are making you sick then

> turn the fucking TV off. I myself had to go on a little news holiday

> after hearing Boris Yeltsin threatening World War III over Iraq.

>

> Now. Back to posts about blow jobs, masturbating women, and bubble

> baths.

>

Right you are! Tonight after XFiles I think it'll time for some good old

sex talk! That Scully always gets me going! I'd like to flip her like a

pancake! You guys have been so good, responding so thoughtfully to my

crap, it's time to dust off the mental scrapbook and look at some of the

better aspects of things. I promise that all my posts won't be so

depressing, even though I don't really think of them that way. People

always think of those who see the glass as half-empty as "cynical,"

"pessimistic," or "gloomy," when in fact they simply tend to be more

solidly grounded in reality. I have plenty of enjoyment in my life, but

it's irresponsible to think that because I have it easy that others do

too, and not see the world we live in as SERIOUSLY FUCKED. Besides, I find

writing about this stuff very cathartic, and it makes me happy to see

people responding so thoughtfully. I'm not trying to be an agent

provocateur in any sense, I just find you guys so simultaneously amusing

and pensive that I sincerely enjoy hearing what you have to say. Carry on!

Special Note: if TarlaStar wrote more about the Pope Blowjob saga, I

didn't get it as my newserver is being extremely erratic of late. If she

did, could someone email it to me please.

 

axel heyst

 

 

> ObSlack:

> Drowning out obnoxious radio/TV commercials with abusive ad-libs:

> RICH, CHOCOLATY OVULATING TEENS.

> SUCK MY EIGHT POUND UPRIGHT...WITH ALTOIDS!

> CALL OUR TWENTY-FOUR HOUR PHYSIC HOTLINE.

> --

> And another thing I've been wondering lately:

> Am I crazy to believe in ideals?

> -- Hoodoo Gurus

 

From nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com Sun Feb 22 22:34:04 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 06:34:04 GMT

 

axel@SPAMX.verinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

 

big snip

 

>People

>always think of those who see the glass as half-empty as "cynical,"

>"pessimistic," or "gloomy," when in fact they simply tend to be more

>solidly grounded in reality. I have plenty of enjoyment in my life, but

>it's irresponsible to think that because I have it easy that others do

>too, and not see the world we live in as SERIOUSLY FUCKED.

 

This is the CONNNNNNN, dude, sucking your brain for sure. You have

plenty of enjoyment, do you? How about PLEASURE, brain-fucking,

heart-rending PLEASURE? Skip to my Lou, I love you and it's oh boy

almond joy, will you be mine, jump up and down for JOY kind of JOY!

Isn't that what you said you were missing??? Well it's no goddam

wonder if you bought that sorry bill of goods the CON sold you. When

the con can't hold you slave to a death delivering job, when it can't

force you into brainmelt in front of the tube, when it senses

intellect AND compassion, it sells you on the sad, sad story that

because misery exists anywhere in the world, none of us can be truly

happy. Or as one sick fuck put it in an article I read once on

abolishing prisons, "When one of us is in prison, we are all in

prison." Hah! The only prison that guy existed in was one of his own

making. What a goddam fool to think that life can't be lived

exuberantly until a fucking miracle happens and we're all

simultaneously free, healthy and happy!!!!!! And you, solidly grounded

in reality????????? How about held down by chains of your own

construction, how about so focused on the fucked up things this world

has to offer that you can't see the fucking MIRACLES taking place

every minute right before your very eyes? I can count seven miracles

in seven seconds, all of them amazing, life-giving things, while

sitting right here in front of the computer! You fucked up, dude. You

let them CONvince you that 35=adult, grown-up, dull,decrepit,

lifeless, eyes shut and nose to the grindstone. You believed them when

they said there was a difference between being a child and being

grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

little memory of it by the time they're grown. You are FREE every

second of every day, and accepting the burdens of others when you

didn't cause them is the rope the CON will use to hang you one day.

 

 

>Besides, I find

>writing about this stuff very cathartic,

 

Amen, brother, and welcome to the fold!

 

Sister Pammy of the Soil

 

 

 

 

 

From kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net Sun Feb 22 23:13:08 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "kevbob" <kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net>

Date: 23 Feb 1998 07:13:08 GMT

 

 

 

Sister Pammy of the Soil <nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com> wrote in

article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>...

> axel@SPAMX.verinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

<beautific snippage>

> Amen, brother, and welcome to the fold!

>

> Sister Pammy of the Soil

 

ma'am, i feel dumb stating the obvious,

but you are most certainly an angel amongst

us swine.

 

shine on, evermore.

 

please.

 

 

 

--

"um,i'msorryihunguponyouithoughtyouweredigitalionlygotfourhoursofsleepbye.

 

click." -arkabeeink

 

From felixxx@goodnet.com Mon Feb 23 08:53:47 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com>

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 09:53:47 -0700

truely pleases me is a loud fart in a quiet church!

 

--

~ren, the current Elvis J.R. of the &#696; cAbAl

 

From mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net Mon Feb 23 03:41:28 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net (Michael Townsend)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 06:41:28 -0500

 

In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil) wrote:

 

--> And you, solidly grounded

--> in reality????????? How about held down by chains of your own

--> construction, how about so focused on the fucked up things this world

--> has to offer that you can't see the fucking MIRACLES taking place

--> every minute right before your very eyes?

 

Taosend say:

Being solidly grounded in reality means seeing both the empty and the

full, not bothering to name the glass as half-anything. If you go around

raving "Happy Happy Joy Joy" all the time, next thing you know they're

packing you off to the funny farm. Balance = contentment and all that.

 

--> You believed them when

--> they said there was a difference between being a child and being

--> grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

--> which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

--> little memory of it by the time they're grown.

 

As a parent I can relate to this one. Since my parents denied it to me,

the only way I can get back (my Slack) is to make sure my kid has as

little of it as I can afford!

 

--

mtownsend@earthlink.net po box 4722 portland me 04112-4722

I got baloney, anyway.

 

From nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com Mon Feb 23 11:45:06 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 19:45:06 GMT

 

mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net (Michael Townsend) wrote:

 

>In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

>nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil) wrote:

>

>--> And you, solidly grounded

>--> in reality????????? How about held down by chains of your own

>--> construction, how about so focused on the fucked up things this world

>--> has to offer that you can't see the fucking MIRACLES taking place

>--> every minute right before your very eyes?

>

>Taosend say:

>Being solidly grounded in reality means seeing both the empty and the

>full, not bothering to name the glass as half-anything. If you go around

>raving "Happy Happy Joy Joy" all the time, next thing you know they're

>packing you off to the funny farm. Balance = contentment and all that.

 

I dunno, Dad, it's damn near spring here and when the sap rises in my

blood the only response I know is "happy happy, joy, joy"! I balance

on AIR most of the time!!! I don't worry that too much happiness will

have to be paid for with equal time in the pits of despair, although

this used to be the case for me. I learned better, or as Dave would

say, I matured a little. Other people lose the highs as they get

older; I lose the lows. I AM this happy. 'Sides, I was semi-quoting my

favorite Walker Percy character, who ESCAPED from the funny farm in

fact.

 

 

>--> You believed them when

>--> they said there was a difference between being a child and being

>--> grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

>--> which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

>--> little memory of it by the time they're grown.

>

>As a parent I can relate to this one. Since my parents denied it to me,

>the only way I can get back (my Slack) is to make sure my kid has as

>little of it as I can afford!

 

"Youth ends where manhood begins, it is said. A phrase without

meaning, since from the beginning of history man has never enjoyed the

full measure of youth nor known the limitless possibilities of

adulthood. How can one know the fullness and splendor of youth if

one's energies are consumed in combatting the errors and falsities of

parents and ancestors? Is youth to waste its strengths unlocking the

grip of death? Is youth's only mission on earth to rebel, to destroy,

to assassinate? Is youth only to be offered up for sacrifice? What of

the DREAMS of youth? Are they always to be populated only with

chimeras? Dreams are the shoots and buds of imagination: they have the

right to lead pure lives also. Stifle or deform youth's dreams and you

destroy the creator. If society has come to resemble a collection of

deformities, is it not the work of our educators and preceptors? Today

as yesterday, the youth who would live his own life has no place to

turn, no place to live his youth unless, retiring into his chrysalis,

he closes all apertures and buries himself alive."

 

--Frankie Goes to Hollywood

 

From mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net Tue Feb 24 03:25:21 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net (Michael Townsend)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 06:25:21 -0500

 

In article <34f1cddb.10428532@news.cphl.mindspring.com>, Sister Pammy of

the Soil wrote:

 

--> I don't worry that too much happiness will

--> have to be paid for with equal time in the pits of despair, although

--> this used to be the case for me. I learned better, or as Dave would

--> say, I matured a little.

 

Then you are truly living in a Fool's Paradise. Praise "Bob!"

 

--> "How can one know the fullness and splendor of youth if

--> one's energies are consumed in combatting the errors and falsities of

--> parents and ancestors?"

 

Gee, that's too fucking bad. The fullness and splendor of youth my ass -

the kid just wants to spend my money! All I ask is for a little

cooperation around here...that's hardly "stifling and deforming youth's

dreams."

 

DAD

 

--

mtownsend@earthlink.net po box 4722 portland me 04112-4722

blame it on my lack of imagination

 

From revjack@radix.net Mon Feb 23 23:41:55 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Sketchy Albedo <revjack@radix.net>

Date: 24 Feb 1998 07:41:55 GMT

 

Taosend say:

: In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil) wrote:

 

: --> You believed them when

: --> they said there was a difference between being a child and being

: --> grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

: --> which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

: --> little memory of it by the time they're grown.

 

: As a parent I can relate to this one. Since my parents denied it to me,

: the only way I can get back (my Slack) is to make sure my kid has as

: little of it as I can afford!

 

Zen Gnostic RevJack nitpicks:

 

You're talking about liberty, not freedom. You are always free.

 

 

Dog! Buddha nature!

The perfect manifestation, the absolute command;

A little "has" or "has not,"

And body is lost! Life is lost!

 

--

_________________

revjack@radix.net

Remove specifics and convert to ambiguities

 

From Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu Mon Feb 23 12:17:12 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)

Date: 23 Feb 1998 20:17:12 GMT

 

In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com felt like sharing this:

>

>axel@SPAMX.verinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

>

>big snip

>

>>People

>>always think of those who see the glass as half-empty as "cynical,"

>>"pessimistic," or "gloomy," when in fact they simply tend to be more

>>solidly grounded in reality. I have plenty of enjoyment in my life,

but

>>it's irresponsible to think that because I have it easy that others do

>>too, and not see the world we live in as SERIOUSLY FUCKED.

>

>This is the CONNNNNNN, dude, sucking your brain for sure. You have

>plenty of enjoyment, do you? How about PLEASURE, brain-fucking,

>heart-rending PLEASURE? Skip to my Lou, I love you and it's oh boy

>almond joy, will you be mine, jump up and down for JOY kind of JOY!

<SNIP>

>let them CONvince you that 35=adult, grown-up, dull,decrepit,

>lifeless, eyes shut and nose to the grindstone. You believed them when

>they said there was a difference between being a child and being

>grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

>which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

>little memory of it by the time they're grown. You are FREE every

>second of every day, and accepting the burdens of others when you

>didn't cause them is the rope the CON will use to hang you one day.

 

Pammy! Pammy! Put the Ayn Rand novel BACK on the table and sloooooowly

back away... OK? Nobody wants to get hurt. It's gonna be OK, everythings

gonna be fine, just put the Objectivist "philosophy" back in the drawer.

Remember, the cult of the individual is the tool the CON uses to keep us

separate... divide and conquer. As long as we're focused on our

own "pleasure" the CON can fool us into buying their FALSE Slack of

complicity while imprisoning our Yeti brethren in similar chains, as

well as in chains less metaphorical. Besides, plenty of us get busloads

of Slack bitching over the fact that OUR government uses OUR money to

slaughter people in the third world, the kind of Slack that comes from

seeing through CON facades, piercing the smoke and mirrors.

 

Life is cruel, yes, but it shouldn't have to be sadistic... and if you

buy into the myth that all of this is necessary and proper than you've

just willingly swallowed whole the biggest lie the CON tries to ram down

our throats.

 

StCBtD

 

 

From nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com Mon Feb 23 23:25:38 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 07:25:38 GMT

 

Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob) wrote:

 

>In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

>nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com felt like sharing this:

 

>>This is the CONNNNNNN, dude, sucking your brain for sure. You have

>>plenty of enjoyment, do you? How about PLEASURE, brain-fucking,

>>heart-rending PLEASURE? Skip to my Lou, I love you and it's oh boy

>>almond joy, will you be mine, jump up and down for JOY kind of JOY!

><SNIP>

>>let them CONvince you that 35=adult, grown-up, dull,decrepit,

>>lifeless, eyes shut and nose to the grindstone. You believed them when

>>they said there was a difference between being a child and being

>>grown, and that it had to do with responsibility and not FREEDOM,

>>which this country steadfastly denies to children, so that they have

>>little memory of it by the time they're grown. You are FREE every

>>second of every day, and accepting the burdens of others when you

>>didn't cause them is the rope the CON will use to hang you one day.

>

>Pammy! Pammy! Put the Ayn Rand novel BACK on the table and sloooooowly

>back away... OK? Nobody wants to get hurt. It's gonna be OK, everythings

>gonna be fine, just put the Objectivist "philosophy" back in the drawer.

>Remember, the cult of the individual is the tool the CON uses to keep us

>separate... divide and conquer. As long as we're focused on our

>own "pleasure" the CON can fool us into buying their FALSE Slack of

>complicity while imprisoning our Yeti brethren in similar chains, as

>well as in chains less metaphorical. Besides, plenty of us get busloads

>of Slack bitching over the fact that OUR government uses OUR money to

>slaughter people in the third world, the kind of Slack that comes from

>seeing through CON facades, piercing the smoke and mirrors.

>

>Life is cruel, yes, but it shouldn't have to be sadistic... and if you

>buy into the myth that all of this is necessary and proper than you've

>just willingly swallowed whole the biggest lie the CON tries to ram down

>our throats.

 

You're obviously reading alot into my post that I didn't actually say,

but you seem to have snipped the part I think you're reacting to. I

was responding to Axel's statement that he is unable to achieve

happiness in the world from focusing on other people's pain. My point

is that being able to separate myself from others to the degree that I

can own my own happiness is essential. That does not mean that I fail

to see and respond to other people in pain. It does mean that I have a

choice in the matter, since I haven't convinced myself that their

suffering HAS to affect me. Seems like I'm freer and more honest about

it than most people is all.

 

SPOTS--Ayn who?

 

From Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu Mon Feb 23 23:53:53 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob)

Date: 24 Feb 1998 07:53:53 GMT

 

In article <34f273d0.52919400@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com felt like sharing this:

>

>Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob) wrote:

>

>>In article <34f11230.18105132@news.cphl.mindspring.com>,

>>nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com felt like sharing this:

>

>>Pammy! Pammy! Put the Ayn Rand novel BACK on the table and sloooooowly

>>back away... OK? Nobody wants to get hurt. It's gonna be OK,

everythings

>>gonna be fine, just put the Objectivist "philosophy" back in the

drawer.

>>Remember, the cult of the individual is the tool the CON uses to keep

us

>>separate... divide and conquer. As long as we're focused on our

>>own "pleasure" the CON can fool us into buying their FALSE Slack of

>>complicity while imprisoning our Yeti brethren in similar chains, as

>>well as in chains less metaphorical. Besides, plenty of us get busloads

>>of Slack bitching over the fact that OUR government uses OUR money to

>>slaughter people in the third world, the kind of Slack that comes from

>>seeing through CON facades, piercing the smoke and mirrors.

>>

>>Life is cruel, yes, but it shouldn't have to be sadistic... and if you

>>buy into the myth that all of this is necessary and proper than you've

>>just willingly swallowed whole the biggest lie the CON tries to ram

down

>>our throats.

>

>You're obviously reading alot into my post that I didn't actually say,

>but you seem to have snipped the part I think you're reacting to. I

>was responding to Axel's statement that he is unable to achieve

>happiness in the world from focusing on other people's pain. My point

>is that being able to separate myself from others to the degree that I

>can own my own happiness is essential. That does not mean that I fail

>to see and respond to other people in pain. It does mean that I have a

>choice in the matter, since I haven't convinced myself that their

>suffering HAS to affect me. Seems like I'm freer and more honest about

>it than most people is all.

 

This is what I get for coming into the middle of a debate, I guess. Then

again I wouldn't be a good Sub if'n I didn't stick my ass where it

doesn't belong. 'Sides, I'm cranky cos my editor harshed on me for making

too many obscure references.

 

>SPOTS--Ayn who?

 

Don't ask... we're still scraping the plasma off the walls from the last

time her "ideas" came up in alt.slack. [glancing around to see if Tarla

heard]

 

StCBtD

 

 

From !!!bmyers@ionet.net Tue Feb 24 05:02:00 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 13:02:00 GMT

 

Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob) wrote:

 

 

>>SPOTS--Ayn who?

 

>Don't ask... we're still scraping the plasma off the walls from the last

>time her "ideas" came up in alt.slack. [glancing around to see if Tarla

>heard]

 

Oh...I heard. I ALWAYS hear.

***

Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually

Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.

Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

 

 

From nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com Tue Feb 24 23:03:21 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil)

Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 07:03:21 GMT

 

Bob_Chapman@NOSPAM!.brown.edu (Crazy Bob) wrote:

 

 

>This is what I get for coming into the middle of a debate, I guess. Then

>again I wouldn't be a good Sub if'n I didn't stick my ass where it

>doesn't belong. 'Sides, I'm cranky cos my editor harshed on me for making

>too many obscure references.

>

>>SPOTS--Ayn who?

>

>Don't ask... we're still scraping the plasma off the walls from the last

>time her "ideas" came up in alt.slack. [glancing around to see if Tarla

>heard]

 

 

Hello Crazy Bob! Where you been hidin' lately? You are always welcome

to stick your butt into the middle of a debate, only I didn't expect

you to back down so quickly after that first beautiful rant. You make

it too easy!!!

 

Can we add "harsh" the verb to that list of abused words in that other

thread?!?!?!

 

Sis PAm

 

From UnitIV@sputum.com Tue Feb 24 22:16:34 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: UnitIV@sputum.com (Doktor DynaSoar)

Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 06:16:34 GMT

 

Sister Pammy of the Soil wrote:

 

}SPOTS--Ayn who?

 

Zackly. Ain't it funny how they'll paint a face on their own straw man and

name it after you?

 

Linear thinking.

 

--

(@ @)\DynaSoar\___, Doktor DynaSoar Iridium, Scienfictiontologist

ll ll Yetii Genetii Research InstiToot, Somedamnwhere, VA

Clench of The One True Pipe Dream, ElectroChurch of the SubGenius

 

From user@domain.demon.co.uk Sat Feb 21 12:00:03 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: user@domain.demon.co.uk (dode)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 20:00:03 GMT

 

On Sat, 21 Feb 1998 11:28:34 GMT, no@email.ads (Christopher

Giese) wrote:

 

> The evil genius known as axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

>

> >I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off

> >to think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me

> >too happy anymore.

>

> It's called depression. I am not a doctor, or even a keen observer

> of behavior, but I get the impression that it's common among Subs.

>

 

Obviously; Normisery IS not depression quite a lot of folks

like to pretend otherwise (and there are a lot of analysts

out there who are willing to back you up) but most of us

miserable fucks are just miserable we are not sick.

Depression is a real illness and has nothing to do with

pathetic whiners who have their health, enough cash to

satisfy more than their basic needs and have the ability to

make any change in their life they want to IF THEY HAVE THE

BOLLOCKS!

 

PS Axel you are a lovely man I'm sure. This was not a

personal attack feel free to be as miserable as you want I

do.

 

Doh'd

 

 

From axel@SPAMXverinet.com Sat Feb 21 05:05:53 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 07:05:53 -0600

 

In article <Pine.HPP.3.95.980220190647.14973D-100000@ghoul.ecst.csuchico.e,

Ross of the Fnords <gerbil@ecst.csuchico.edu> wrote:

 

> How sad! You have no slack. Slack for me is like gnosis and bliss

>combined, along with everything going just right without thinking abou

>tit. Slack is something for nothing. Visit www.subgenius.com to learn

>about it.

>

> The Church of the SubGenius is paradoxically one of the only

>"orginizations" in the world that IS FOR NON-JOINERS! We don't want people

>taht will all behave in similar ways, we want difference! We want

>originality! We want crehativity! And we MUST HAVE SLACK.

> More later. I may be able to help you, if your mind is truly open.

>

>

> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

> * _ /|\ _ *

> * [) ( ( Spiritual Prodigy |\ | /| /^\ 23! *

> * |\ () _) _) Insane Artist \ | / / o \\ *

> * <-----+-----> / \ \ *

> * "I'm a drunken Indian man! / | \ / \_/ \ \ *

> * Oh.... oh... oh... The letter, |/_ | _\| / \ / *

> * 'O'... That means yes!" -Russ \|/ /___________\/ *

> * *

> * http://www.ecst.csuchico.edu/~gerbil (The Chaos Gerbil's Lair) *

> * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

>

>

 

I saw the director's cut of "Das Boot"; it's like 10 hours long and in

GERMAN and I still understood more of it than this. I'm no HP Lovecraft but

for Jah's sakes folks a little clarity would help a bit.

 

axel heyst

I remember a quote from Catullus, slave turned poet of the Roman empire:

"Life is a loanshark, extracting a high rate of interest for the few

pleasures it concedes."

 

 

 

From carey@humboldt1.com Sat Feb 21 08:27:41 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: carey@humboldt1.com (Rev. Matthew A. Carey)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 16:27:41 GMT

 

On Fri, 20 Feb 1998 06:22:58 -0600, axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst)

wrote:

 

>

>getting old). So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

>episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

>you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>with time.

>

 

 

Dim underground rooms.

Laying in bed

News radio

Chocolate

Books

Something to write on

 

I used to want more. But i've realized that it's not worth it.

 

"LESS WORK. MORE PLAY." -- The Armaggeddonists

 

 

 

 

:::

noise obscure experimental

carey.matthew.a <http://www.humboldt1.com/~carey/>

orbital art colony weird text files

:::

 

From twgs@whatsthepoint.net Sat Feb 21 10:47:42 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

Date: Sat, 21 Feb 1998 18:47:42 GMT

 

Thus spake axel heyst:

 

> I'm at the point in my life -male/single/35/no kids/taking time off to

>think about stuff- where I don't find much that really makes me too happy

>anymore.

 

No surprise there. That's how it is with most people, except they

never bother taking the time to think about it.

 

> I guess you guys have it made with the saucers and all, but even

>though I like all of you very much I'm just not a joining type of person,

 

Are ANY of us? (HINT: No.) Hey, I'm sure there wil be people who

will continue to eviscerate you for this post, because that's the kind

of newsgroup this is, but I'm feeling nice and friendly, and you were

nice enough not to mention "Bob". Some people will flame you if you

don't come on like you're ready to rip anyone's guts out at a glance,

probably because this is an apocalypse cult after all, but you're at

least looking for answers, which is an improvement over most folks,

who don't even bother looking for anything. And you ask a damn good

question, as well.

 

As for the joining thing- the way this cult works is, you don't join

up. Generally somebody finds the Church, realizes "This is what I've

believed all my life" (which of course isn't true, but is close enough

to pass for the truth), and starts calling him or herself a Subgenius.

 

What makes me happy aside from the inevitable prospect of the

obliteration of the human race? Lots of things. Good company, first

and foremost. I enjoy being around people I like. Doing something I

think is worthwhile, too. For instance, writing something intelligent

and cohesive. I like that. I like the buzz I get from coffee. I

like reading books, actual physical books. Richard Brautigan's books

usually make me happy. I like doing the dishes. Cunnilingus, though

it's more the idea of it at this point. A long shower. Cold pizza.

Making other people happy. Above all, laughing.

 

How has what makes me happy changed over time? They used to be

focused a lot more on goods. When I was a kid, toys made me happy.

Downloading WaReZ made me happy. Not getting beaten up made me happy.

Being alone made me happy. Mostly I hated other people. I still do,

but I've found enough people I like that I can acknowledge they're

worth spending time around. The Church hasn't changed my likes-

that's not what the Church does; it just allows you to feel justified

in who you are. That's what the Divine Excuse is about. I've matured

a little, is all.

 

--

I DISCRIMINATE AGAINST NORMALS twgs @thepoint.net KILL UGLY INTERNET

"Sister system, give me my leg back, will you? I've only been given

light-red fennels; hope you'll sob into a sunflower" - Lars Hollmer

 

From kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net Sat Feb 21 14:49:32 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "kevbob" <kevbob.AlLsPaM@ecsis.net>

Date: 21 Feb 1998 22:49:32 GMT

 

 

Max Sendq <twgs@whatsthepoint.net> wrote in article >

<snippage>

> in who you are. That's what the Divine Excuse is about. I've matured

> a little, is all.

 

bravo.

 

 

--

"Where IS my beautiful wife?"-rkb inc.

 

 

From bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu Sun Feb 22 23:55:13 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu (Nully Fydyan)

Date: 23 Feb 98 07:55:13 GMT

 

In article <34fc1cf6.16617778@news.newsguy.com>, twgs@whatsthepoint.net

(Max Sendq) wrote:

 

> The Church hasn't changed my likes-

> that's not what the Church does; it just allows you to feel justified

> in who you are. That's what the Divine Excuse is about. I've matured a

> little, is all.

 

But not too much, praise "Bob"!!

 

--

Rev. Nully Fydyan

Church of the Ungendered Yeti

 

"Don't blink or you'll miss it, it's the end of free will" -- Kevin Gilbert

 

From UnitIV@sputum.com Sat Feb 21 20:35:28 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: UnitIV@sputum.com (Doktor DynaSoar)

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 04:35:28 GMT

 

axel heyst wrote:

 

}How about

}you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

}with time.

 

I've quit expecting helpful answers from the net and the Church of the

Subgenius.

 

--

(@ @)\DynaSoar\___, Doktor DynaSoar Iridium, Scienfictiontologist

ll ll Yetii Genetii Research InstiToot, Somedamnwhere, VA

Clench of The One True Pipe Dream, ElectroChurch of the SubGenius

 

From mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net Sat Feb 21 22:11:51 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: mtownOsPaMend@earthlink.net (Michael Townsend)

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 01:11:51 -0500

 

When you've got the Slack, you don't NEED to be happy. That's what I keep

telling myself.

 

As for what makes me GOOFY, that would have to be all this bulldada I keep

injecting into my brain.

 

--

mtownsend@earthlink.net po box 4722 portland me 04112-4722

I got baloney, anyway.

 

From saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org Sun Feb 22 11:29:46 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: saint andreux <saint@*bugger-off!*prairienet.org>

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 11:29:46 -0800

 

Doktor DynaSoar wrote:

> axel heyst wrote:

> }How about

> }you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

> }with time.

> I've quit expecting helpful answers from the net and the Church of the

> Subgenius.

 

Why don't you just start listening to Kajamagoogoo

24/7 then?

 

Christ, is it destiny that we all tun into huge whiners

when there's more HURT than SEX in the Sex/Hurt?

 

--

saint andreux -><- saint@prairienet*org www.prairienet.org/~saint

"that which disturbs your soul you must not suffer" - goethe

VISIONARY DRUNKARD - FREELANCE HIGH-TECH PROPHET FOR PROFITS

INQUIRE FOR QUOTE - EXPERIENCED DRINKING COMPANION - BUGGER OFF

 

From twgs@whatsthepoint.net Sun Feb 22 21:09:41 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 05:09:41 GMT

 

Thus spake Doktor DynaSoar:

 

>axel heyst wrote:

>

>}How about

>}you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>}with time.

>

>I've quit expecting helpful answers from the net and the Church of the

>Subgenius.

 

Did you ever? The funny thing is how sometimes you get them anyway..

but only if you're not expecting them.

 

--

I DISCRIMINATE AGAINST NORMALS twgs @thepoint.net KILL UGLY INTERNET

"Sister system, give me my leg back, will you? I've only been given

light-red fennels; hope you'll sob into a sunflower" - Lars Hollmer

 

From carey@humboldt1.com Sun Feb 22 17:11:55 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: carey@humboldt1.com (Rev. Matthew A. Carey)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 01:11:55 GMT

 

On Mon, 23 Feb 1998 05:09:41 GMT, twgs@whatsthepoint.net (Max Sendq)

wrote:

 

>Thus spake Doktor DynaSoar:

>

>>axel heyst wrote:

>>

>>}How about

>>}you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>>}with time.

>>

>>I've quit expecting helpful answers from the net and the Church of the

>>Subgenius.

>

>Did you ever? The funny thing is how sometimes you get them anyway..

>but only if you're not expecting them.

 

 

Ah, so Roshi Lynch.

 

 

 

:::

noise obscure experimental

carey.matthew.a <http://www.humboldt1.com/~carey/>

orbital art colony weird text files

:::

 

From bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu Mon Feb 23 07:32:10 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu (Nully Fydyan)

Date: 23 Feb 98 15:32:10 GMT

 

In article <34f10476.7233073@news.newsguy.com>, twgs@whatsthepoint.net

(Max Sendq) wrote:

 

> Thus spake Doktor DynaSoar:

>

> >axel heyst wrote:

> >

> >}How about

> >}you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

> >}with time.

> >

> >I've quit expecting helpful answers from the net and the Church of the

> >Subgenius.

>

> Did you ever? The funny thing is how sometimes you get them anyway..

> but only if you're not expecting them.

 

 

All I have to say is, does anybody remember my Kant debacle?

 

PRAISE RANDOM!!!!

 

 

Nully

still (and ever) grateful

 

--

Rev. Nully Fydyan

Church of the Ungendered Yeti

 

"Don't blink or you'll miss it, it's the end of free will" -- Kevin Gilbert

 

From !!!bmyers@ionet.net Sun Feb 22 06:22:49 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Date: Sun, 22 Feb 1998 14:22:49 GMT

 

axel@SPAMXverinet.com (axel heyst) wrote:

 

>... So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

>episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

>you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>with time.

 

My needs are simple:

 

A good cup of coffee while watching the sunset from my porch

Finishing a project and having it come out just as I visualized

Laughing with my friends and sons.

A well-made meal makes me happy

Digging in the garden, smelling the dirt and anticipating the growth

of seeds makes me happy.

Occasionally seeing Justice done makes me happy.

The fact that the kitten sleeps on ME, makes me happy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

***

Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually

Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.

Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

 

 

From felixxx@goodnet.com Mon Feb 23 09:10:37 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com>

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 10:10:37 -0700

 

> The fact that the kitten sleeps on ME, makes me happy.

 

We steal away your breath at night.

 

--

~ren, the current Elvis J.R. of the &#696; cAbAl

 

From !!!bmyers@ionet.net Mon Feb 23 09:34:14 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 17:34:14 GMT

 

Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com> wrote:

 

>> The fact that the kitten sleeps on ME, makes me happy.

 

>We steal away your breath at night.

 

You'll be sorry...you have no IDEA what I've been eating!

***

Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually

Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.

Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

 

 

From nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com Mon Feb 23 22:59:49 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 06:59:49 GMT

 

!!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar) wrote:

 

>Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com> wrote:

>

>>> The fact that the kitten sleeps on ME, makes me happy.

>

>>We steal away your breath at night.

>

>You'll be sorry...you have no IDEA what I've been eating!

 

Mice, apparently.

 

 

From !!!bmyers@ionet.net Tue Feb 24 05:03:00 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: !!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 13:03:00 GMT

 

nojunkmailtoxiccow@mindspring.com (Sister Pammy of the Soil) wrote:

 

>!!!bmyers@ionet.net (TarlaStar) wrote:

 

>>Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com> wrote:

>>

>>>> The fact that the kitten sleeps on ME, makes me happy.

>>

>>>We steal away your breath at night.

>>

>>You'll be sorry...you have no IDEA what I've been eating!

 

>Mice, apparently.

 

No wonder that damned cat's been sleeping on me!

 

***

Reverend Mutha Tarla Star of the Little Sisters of the Perpetually

Juicy; a Proud jism schism of the Church of the SubGenius.

Worshipping Juicy Retardo and "Connie" Dobbs since 1986.

 

 

From UnitIV@sputum.com Tue Feb 24 22:19:24 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: UnitIV@sputum.com (Doktor DynaSoar)

Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 06:19:24 GMT

 

TarlaStar wrote:

 

}>Mice, apparently.

}

}No wonder that damned cat's been sleeping on me!

}

 

No, it's crotch warmth most likely. I never eat anything smaller than a

bovine and mine do the same. Then again it could be just plain ornery,

trying to take up my sleeping space because they can. That's really more

likely. When I kick them off they attack my hair and then settle back in.

 

--

(@ @)\DynaSoar\___, Doktor DynaSoar Iridium, Scienfictiontologist

ll ll Yetii Genetii Research InstiToot, Somedamnwhere, VA

Clench of The One True Pipe Dream, ElectroChurch of the SubGenius

 

From felixxx@goodnet.com Wed Feb 25 09:00:45 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: Felix The Cat <felixxx@goodnet.com>

Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 10:00:45 -0700

 

> }No wonder that damned cat's been sleeping on me!

> }

> No, it's crotch warmth most likely. I never eat anything smaller than

 

It has been said that cats often seek crotch

warmth as a vital source of slack. For all cats

are on the evolutionary slacktrack.

 

--

Felix The Cat a.k.a. ren

Current Elvis J.R. III

of the &#696; cAbAl

 

From paulg19@dtc.net Sun Feb 22 17:36:43 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: paulg19@dtc.net (dat ol' Rev Lance Boyle)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 01:36:43 GMT

 

On Fri, 20 Feb 1998 06:22:58 -0600, a little light bulb went on over

the head of axel heyst (axel@SPAMXverinet.com),

and he wrote thus and so to alt.slack:

 

[snip for JUSTICE!!]

 

>...So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

>episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

>you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>with time.

 

Good music

Good books

Good friends

Good food

Good sex

 

Covers it all, don't it?

--

 

"Still later, Gerald did a terrible

thing to Elsie with a saucepan."

 

- Edward Gorey

 

The Somewhat Left-of-Center Reverend Lance Boyle

 

 

From snorts@noodle.com Mon Feb 23 12:24:45 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: snorts@noodle.com (RevLurch)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 20:24:45 GMT

 

paulg19@dtc.net (dat ol' Rev Lance Boyle) wrote:

 

>On Fri, 20 Feb 1998 06:22:58 -0600, a little light bulb went on over

>the head of axel heyst (axel@SPAMXverinet.com),

> and he wrote thus and so to alt.slack:

>

>[snip for JUSTICE!!]

>

>>...So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

>>am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

>>episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

>>you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

>>with time.

>

>Good music

>Good books

>Good friends

>Good food

>Good sex

>

>Covers it all, don't it?

 

You left out senseless violence.

 

From charliec@cybernex.net Mon Feb 23 15:00:14 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 23:00:14 GMT

 

RevLurch wrote:

>

> paulg19@dtc.net (dat ol' Rev Lance Boyle) wrote:

>

> >On Fri, 20 Feb 1998 06:22:58 -0600, a little light bulb went on over

> >the head of axel heyst (axel@SPAMXverinet.com),

> > and he wrote thus and so to alt.slack:

> >

> >[snip for JUSTICE!!]

> >

> >>...So if it wasn't for the saucers, what would make you happy? I

> >>am genuinely curious. I mostly like my pets and good books, with a Simpsons

> >>episode and an interesting Ted Koppel thrown in for good measure. How about

> >>you guys? I'd be interested in knowing how your expectations have changed

> >>with time.

> >

> >Good music

> >Good books

> >Good friends

> >Good food

> >Good sex

> >

> >Covers it all, don't it?

>

> You left out senseless violence.

 

I think that comes under 'good music', doesn't it?

 

From paulg19@dtc.net Mon Feb 23 16:44:01 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: paulg19@dtc.net (the vivacious Rev. Lance Boyle)

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 00:44:01 GMT

 

On Mon, 23 Feb 1998 23:00:14 GMT, a little light bulb went on over the

head of TheCharlie (TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>),

and he wrote thus and so to alt.slack:

 

>RevLurch wrote:

>>

(But first I wrote)

>> >

>> >Good music

>> >Good books

>> >Good friends

>> >Good food

>> >Good sex

>> >

>> >Covers it all, don't it?

>>

>> You left out senseless violence.

 

>I think that comes under 'good music', doesn't it?

 

I could have added "Make sure the right people get hurt", but that

could fit anyplace in my list, yesno?

--

 

"One must have the heart of

stone to read the death of

Little Nell without laughing".

 

- Oscar Wilde

 

Dat ol' Rev. Lance Boyle

 

 

From charliec@cybernex.net Tue Feb 24 15:29:48 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 23:29:48 GMT

 

the vivacious Rev. Lance Boyle wrote:

>

> On Mon, 23 Feb 1998 23:00:14 GMT, a little light bulb went on over the

> head of TheCharlie (TheCharlie <charliec@cybernex.net>),

> and he wrote thus and so to alt.slack:

>

> >RevLurch wrote:

> >>

> (But first I wrote)

> >> >

> >> >Good music

> >> >Good books

> >> >Good friends

> >> >Good food

> >> >Good sex

> >> >

> >> >Covers it all, don't it?

> >>

> >> You left out senseless violence.

>

> >I think that comes under 'good music', doesn't it?

>

> I could have added "Make sure the right people get hurt", but that

> could fit anyplace in my list, yesno?

 

That comes under 'good sex'.

 

From kevbob.aLLsPaM@ecsis.net Mon Feb 23 20:08:08 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: kevbob.aLLsPaM@ecsis.net (kevbob)

Date: Mon, 23 Feb 1998 23:08:08 -0500

 

In article <34f1daa3.18965730@news.mindspring.com>, ah, fuck it wrote:

 

> You left out senseless violence.

 

and walmart.

 

i don;t know why, but walmart makes me happy.

there are always people there, who seem much more miserable than me.

the tape bin has really hard to find shit, occasionally, and really cheap too.

 

the have comfy rilly big UGLY shirts, cheap too.

 

(god bless slave labor!)

 

and really bad music.

and loud music.

and kool aid. sugar, and there's flavor too.

 

and friends who don;t care how insane you are, and know what you mean,

eventhough there is no earthly way you could EVER really say it the way

you want to say it.

 

and people who maintain contact with you, even when it would be far, far

easier to just stop.

 

and finding that cd, just lying there in the bin, after you have looked

for it for so long,t hat you had forgotten all about it.

 

and making a dog smile, maybe one last time, just by paying attention to

her, and scratching her behind the ears.

 

fresh bread with gobs of butter.

 

people who always think you are joking, when you aren;t, and serious, when

you are joking. of all the things, that one just doesn't make me mad

anymore.

 

terrible poetry for its own sake.

 

japanese avant-garde pop-lounge bands. A for effort there.

 

usenet. usenet is bytes and bytes is slack.

 

lurch using the word sansabelt in context.

 

hello kitty notepad pages.

 

birthday presents.

 

a comfortable pair of jeans.

 

mighty ducks part 2. one of the few movies that can make me cry.

(and the disney channel, for allowing me to see it, since i would never

have thought of renting it.)

 

the alt.slack brat pack faq.

 

flames.

 

snow. snow rocks. lyiing onyour back, maybe just a little liquorred up so

you don;t feel the cold so much, and just watching the flakes fall

downinto your face.

 

really pissed off singers.

 

books.

 

old comic books you see and realize you owned, a long time ago in a

difffernt world.

 

puff daddy, that man IS slack. praPuffy!

 

and stuff.

 

--

"someone tried to tell me something,

don't let the world bring you down,

nothing will do me in before i do myself,

so save it for your own and the ones you can help."

-chris cornell

 

From bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu Mon Feb 23 23:59:09 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu (Nully Fydyan)

Date: 24 Feb 98 07:59:09 GMT

 

In article <kevbob.aLLsPaM-2302982308080001@obion1-40.ecsis.net>,

kevbob.aLLsPaM@ecsis.net (kevbob) wrote:

 

 

> the alt.slack brat pack faq.

 

 

Should I even ask?

 

Considering, considering, considering....

 

No. It's too scary, whatever it is.

 

--

Rev. Nully Fydyan

Church of the Ungendered Yeti

 

"Don't blink or you'll miss it, it's the end of free will" -- Kevin Gilbert

 

From mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net Tue Feb 24 01:21:33 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net" <mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net>

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 09:21:33 +0000

 

In article <kevbob.aLLsPaM-2302982308080001@obion1-40.ecsis.net>,

kevbob.aLLsPaM@ecsis.net (kevbob) wrote:

 

> hello kitty notepad pages.

 

When I was in high school, a female friend of mine (whom I regarded as one

of the few sensible people I knew) came to school one day with one of those

cutesy-wutesy little clear plastic pouches containing a Hello Kitty notepad,

pencils, etc. My faith in her sensibilities completely shattered, I stole

her notepad and made a flip-picture-cartoon-thing out of it called Hello

Kitty Goes to Hell, in which that darling kitten face spontaneously bursts

into flames, is reduced to ashes, and a lovely segmented worm crawls out of

the remains. Much to my astonishment, she loved it.

 

From bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu Tue Feb 24 12:39:20 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu (Nully Fydyan)

Date: 24 Feb 98 20:39:20 GMT

 

In article <6cuksu$coa@bgtnsc02.worldnet.att.net>,

"mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net" <mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net> wrote:

 

> In article <kevbob.aLLsPaM-2302982308080001@obion1-40.ecsis.net>,

> kevbob.aLLsPaM@ecsis.net (kevbob) wrote:

>

> > hello kitty notepad pages.

>

> When I was in high school, a female friend of mine (whom I regarded as one

> of the few sensible people I knew) came to school one day with one of those

> cutesy-wutesy little clear plastic pouches containing a Hello Kitty notepad,

> pencils, etc. My faith in her sensibilities completely shattered, I stole

> her notepad and made a flip-picture-cartoon-thing out of it called Hello

> Kitty Goes to Hell, in which that darling kitten face spontaneously bursts

> into flames, is reduced to ashes, and a lovely segmented worm crawls out of

> the remains. Much to my astonishment, she loved it.

 

And you didn't marry her?

 

Well, is she still single?

 

--

Rev. Nully Fydyan

Church of the Ungendered Yeti

 

"Don't blink or you'll miss it, it's the end of free will" -- Kevin Gilbert

 

From mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net Tue Feb 24 11:46:31 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: "mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net" <mrichmond1@worldnet.att.net>

Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 19:46:31 +0000

 

In article <bg19354-2402981533380001@128.226.103.209>,

bg19354@NoMoReDaMnSpAm.binghamton.edu (Nully Fydyan) wrote:

 

> > hello kitty notepad pages.

> >

> > When I was in high school, a female friend of mine (whom I regarded as

one

> > of the few sensible people I knew) came to school one day with one of

those

> > cutesy-wutesy little clear plastic pouches containing a Hello Kitty

notepad,

> > pencils, etc. My faith in her sensibilities completely shattered, I

stole

> > her notepad and made a flip-picture-cartoon-thing out of it called Hello

> > Kitty Goes to Hell, in which that darling kitten face spontaneously

bursts

> > into flames, is reduced to ashes, and a lovely segmented worm crawls out

of

> > the remains. Much to my astonishment, she loved it.

>

> And you didn't marry her?

>

> Well, is she still single?

>

 

Couldn't tell you, as we lost touch years ago. She became a Christian,

which diminished her attractiveness considerably, needless to say. Just

goes to show, no matter how Sub someone might seem, you just can't trust

pinks. Of course, you can't trust SubG's either, but hell! A

__________

Emmett the Immanent

 

The highest Slack is like water

Water gives life to the myriad of things, and does not strive

It flows in places men reject, and so is like Slack.

 

Tao Te Ching (updated)

few double standards never hurt anybody.

 

From no@email.ads Tue Feb 24 20:10:10 1998

Newsgroups: alt.slack

Subject: Re: So what makes Subgenii happy?

From: no@email.ads (Christopher Giese)

Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 04:10:10 GMT

 

Yow! What a humongous, inspiring, Slackful thread. I'm gonna save it

on my hard drive.

 

Good volley, good volley.

 

 

 

ObSlack:

Shouting "BORK BORK BORK" when I drop something in the kitchen.

--

"What the world needs now are some true words of wisdom

Like la la la la la la la la la." -- Cracker, _Teen Angst_