From @ Mon Jul 06 10:18:04 1998
Subject: Screwed by "Bob"?
Date: 6 Jul 1998 10:18:04 -0700
In article <firstname.lastname@example.org>, email@example.com says...
>what I saw was a fair number of "normals" mixed
>into the group being exposed to stuff that hopefully
>will inspire them feel that its ok to be "weird" and
I think all of the "Hey I want my ninety bucks", "Where's the saucers", "'Bob'
fucked up" posts are rooted in a deep resentment for the fact that NBC, ABC,
CNN, CNBC, AP, Reuters, [insert media magnate] didn't hop all over the event and
splash headlines everywhere for people's co-workers and parents to read,
VALIDATING that they are LEGITIMATE and DULY RECOGNIZED weirdoes. EMBRACE YOUR
ABNORMALITY, NO MATTER HOW STUPID IT IS WHEN YOU STOP TO THINK ABOUT IT. If you
can't fool yourself, how did you *ever* expect to fleece and fluff the "gullible
idiots and bobbies" in the Church of the SubGenius (in alt.slack, "gullible
idiots and bobbies" is usually pronounced "everyone who's not you")? They say
that the only way to become a leader is to be a good follower. So, too, the
only way to become a good salesman is to be the epitome of a "Dutiful Consumer".
CONTINUE TO PURCHASE CHURCH GOODS AND STUDY YOUR OWN CONSUMPTION HABITS. A good
tip is to keep a pad and pen with you at all times to take notes on what you
were thinking just before you reached for a product, any product. And think
back to why you picked the Church of the SubGenius as your Official Salvation
Provider above all others. I can bet you shopped around before you found out
that the CoS has/had the BEST LINE OF BULLSHIT IN SALVATION TODAY! And from
what I've seen, the X-Day Detractors should study, study, study, because the
best of THEIR bullshit is neither believable, nor marketable.
This all has nothing to do with this thread.
"Bob" pulled the wool over you complainers eyes. Now, go and do ye likewise.
>Oh yeah, Stang was not covered with motor oil as
>you mentioned, it was honey, then the feathers.
Butbutbut...that was my FAVORITE LIE!
Padre W'h'eezer G. Wilco
First Church of the Dutiful Consumer
Heretic Order of the Golden Brown