netFrom: email@example.com (Dennis McClain-Furmanski)
Subject: Re: NENSLO Death Threat
Date: 26 Aug 1995 18:48:30 GMT
On Fri. Aug 25, 1995, Ojk@abyssal.demon.co.uk told All:
> * 2qwk! 1.26b3 * I have a rock garden. Last week three of them died.
> Dear sir,
> if the weather in your part of the world has been like it
> has here i suggest covering your rocks during the hottest
> part of the day and watering them thoroughly in the
> evening. yours:-0
> Pope "O.J" Obi Juan Kennedy III.
I'm very grateful for your advice. I will follow it with the remainder of
the crop. However, it turns out this was not the cause of death of these
three. It seems they were infected with a virus known as
micaschistomiasis. They flaked out. I have innoculated the rest of them
using a topical corprointment. This was done with due caution, as these
are not 'pet' rocks, but an attempt to augment the local indigenous
population by providing a safe and nurturing environment, while
maintaining their wild state. I have to admit though, I frequently protect
them from predators, which is an artificial environment somewhat. The cows
tend to uncover and kick loose some of the locals in their travels around
the pasture. As the population of these 'newcomers' increases, so does the
stress level of my crop. They tend to stop eating. By walking the 240
acres all night and carrying the loose rocks out to the road, I've been
able to keep the hostiles down to a manageable level. I've asked the cows
to walk softer, but they ignore me. I think they do it on purpose. You
know the type -- hang around in a gang, all dressed the same -- strictly
trouble makers. I've been trying to find a source for Shell No-Cow
Strips(tm), but it seems they're no longer being made. I guess I'll just
have to stick with the Claymore anti-bovine mines. The noise bothers the
crop some, but they do seem to enjoy calculating the trajectory of the cow
pieces and betting on which piece will fly farthest. By becoming used to
the noise, perhaps they'll be better able to survive in the wild state
even though civilization is encoraching on their normal range. Got to run;
one of the picnic tables has just walked up the hill from the park. I have
to head it off before it steps on them. They're blind, you know. They
can't help it.
* 2qwk! 1.26b3 * A metaphor is like a simile.
firstname.lastname@example.org The Doctor is on.